Compass
by Razer Athane
Summary: With nowhere left to turn, a familiar ghost enlists in the help of a timid flower girl to either get back to the world of the living, or get into the world of the dead. -Axel x Aerith-
1. Chapter 1

Author's Note: Yeah. I _should _be focusing on my other multichaps but… I really wanted to do this story ;) Enjoy!

_**1.**_

I can… hear myself talking.

_Don't stop moving, or the darkness will over take you! Get going!_

Do I really sound like that?

_I kidnapped Kairi, but she got away from me. After that, Saix caught her.__  
I think I liked it better when they were on my side.  
Well, that's what happens when you put your whole being into an attack. _

The words bounce around in my head for a few moments.

_Not that Nobodies actually _have_ beings… right?_

Mine, and someone else's words, for that matter. But it's only mine that I can hear as clear as day.

_I wanted to see Roxas. He… was the only one I liked…  
Kairi's in the castle dungeon. Now go._

They're entwined, like a melody. A gentle string of words flowing back and forth, reaching different places on the octave. It's… soothing, but haunting at the same time. Soothing in the sense that, I can relax… Haunting in the sense that, it's my own voice from a few moments ago. A _fair _few moments ago, when I was actually… breathing. When I could raise an arm, and my hand would be doused in flames. When I could grin, and felt my muscles moving around my mouth. But I was still nobody. I was _a _Nobody.

If I was _nobody_ then, who am I now? I'm just… _nothing._

I'm floating. I'm thousands upon thousands of particles, floating aimlessly through the air. I do not have a body, or a voice. I do not have sight, or breath. I'm just a thought. The last remnants of my conscious, hovering about in Betwixt and Between, drifting from here, to there. Fine, black spots amidst a dull rainbow of colours. Disguised, and unable to be seen. Without a purpose, or a direction, or a say; and now, more than ever, totally useless.

I wonder what's going to happen now. I no longer have a place in this world, or _any _worlds for that matter. I've done everything I can to ensure that Roxas – _Sora _gets to the castle, to save Kairi, and to eliminate Xemnas once and for all. With the last of my strength, I cultivated the pathway for him. And as the world around me faded to black, I could barely hear his footsteps, let alone the footsteps of his friends.

My thoughts are stubborn. If only I could let them go, then maybe I'll be free. No more worries, no more concerns, no more… nothing. If my conscious fades away into total oblivion, then I can… relax, for all of time. I can… rest.

* * *

I can hear other voices. One's I know, one's that I've heard heaps of times before.

_We're… best friends, right?  
I… I don't know either. But the heart's not something you can see. _

Most of them are gone now.

_You really are a hero. A heartless hero.  
I'm not going to _break _the toy, Axel. Just play with it._

_Defying me will be seen as treason against the Organisation.  
Imbeciles… You would knowingly shackle your heart with a chain of memories born of lies?_

_I'd rather we just skip the formalities.  
You play the game quite well…_

I haven't heard some of these lines before. Maybe they're being said right now.

_Run! Run away!  
Hey, you guys are looking lively._

Or they've already been said, to someone else.

_We know all too well how to injure a heart.  
Are you angry? Do you hate me? Then take that rage and direct it at the Heartless._

They're all old voices. Old melodies that I thought I had forgotten.

_It's such a shame, the Organisation used to be the rope that bounds us together. And now it's full of kinks.  
He must oppose anyone who hosts the dark._

_Now, stop resisting – and let the darkness in!  
This was a fight I should not have started._

But I haven't.

_I think an experiment would show if he's really of any value to us.  
The memory's wiles are cruel. In its silence, we forget. And in its perversion, it binds our hearts firmly._

I really haven't.

_Yes, let your anger grow…  
Once Kingdom Hearts is ours, we will exist fully and completely._

_Now, do you think that's polite…? Shutting me down like that.  
See, that would work if I was just any old dude. 'Cept I'm not._

I wonder…

_Perhaps it doesn't pay to be too loyal to one's heart.  
Hearts are power. Nothingness… is eternal. _

I wonder if I was right.

Was I doing the right thing? Collecting hearts from the unsuspecting and piecing them together, in the hopes of making one of my own again. One that I could just… thrust into my chest, or something, and become whole once more. I didn't want to be hollow anymore, so I made others hollow in the hopes of filling myself up. But alas, look what it did for me? Nothing. Absolutely nothing. All those hearts, _wasted. _I'm even starting to feel a tinge of regret for what I've done. Not that it's possible, though. I don't have a heart.

I don't even _exist _anymore. I'm just… a bunch of teeny, tiny little atoms.

And I still can't stop thinking.

I'm still aimlessly floating. But it feels like I'm being pulled somewhere. The… air… The gravity… Whatever, it feels different here. Sure, I can't see and stuff, but I can tell when something's different. It doesn't feel like I'm being… upheld here. It feels like I'm being pushed and pulled, this way and that. Half of what's left wants to go to the right, and the other half wants to go down. It's quite frustrating. I wish I could just gather all of them and tell them to go in the one direction, the one that the _conscious _chooses – up.

Though I want to fly free, I'm still being pulled back to the ground.

* * *

I wake up.

My conscious is back up and running again, mulling over the consequences of my past. Just general thinking, because I can't do anything more than that anymore anyway. I can only take the thoughts I have and either replay them in my head, laugh at them, or just… something. Yeah. Just collecting knowledge, reminiscing. Got it memorised?

Soon enough, I'm humming, and it's then that I stop.

When did I gain vocal cords? I'm _nothing, _remember? _I can't _hum.

Perplexed, I clear my throat. Yeah, there's definitely something there. Deciding to test it further, I open (what?) my mouth, and speak. Yes, speak. As in, sound is emitted out of my… throat. Or, what would, _should _be my throat; and I pull out the most cliché test statement in my disorientation, "Hello…?"

God, it's so… My voice kinda sounds like gravel. It's worn, and it… feels…? Old. Tired. In need of rest, which, thanks to my conscious, I clearly haven't gotten. It feels like I've picked up an instrument, like… Demyx's sitar, or something, and have found my melody. _My _melody, the one that _I _play that was _specifically _mine. Like I lost something, and finally found it. Have I been dead for that long? That my own voice sounds foreign to me? Seriously?

There's a steady sound nearby, like a gentle pitter-pattering. I can hear fleeting clicks, like heels. And there's also thudding, like boots. They move by me swiftly, and I turn, as though following the sound. And I move, following the sound. It's like I've latched onto something – _anything – _and just want to go along and see what's happening.

I'm tired –

What?

Right I'm starting to freak out now. How can my _arms and legs _be achy? _I'm dead. _I don't _have _any. I'm only a bunch of freaking particles!

I bring my right hand up to where I assume my face is. Low and behold, its there. My skin… With the hand, I rub my face hastily. The friction of my glove and my hand can be felt, let alone my glove and my face. My palm slides over my closed eye rapidly, back and forth, and _it hurts _from the sheer force I'm using. How is this even possible? And more importantly, what the hell is going on?

I stop the action and thereafter open my eyes, and for the first time I can see everything. I'm standing at the bottom of a stone stairway, and there were two people walking up it. I don't know them, but one is a man with long, brown hair, and the other is a girl in a pink dress. I ignore them for a moment, and look down to the ground, stunned. I can see my feet. I can see the bottom of my cloak.

Am I alive again?

My… My _breathing_ rapidly increases at the prospect. Have I been given a second chance?

Moving quickly, I follow the two people once more. If I run into them and I feel them and they get hit and they fall over and all, then I'm alive. And I hope I am. I really do. There's so much I wanted to do and stuff that… it hurt having it taken away from me so quickly. And with the way things are at the moment, I'd be damned if I was still dead.

With a tiny smile on my face, I conduct my plan and run into them. I close my eyes, bracing myself for the impact of the collision, and run. I run, barely feeling the wind, and so desperate to feel jus that _little bit more. _Just that little bit more. Clothing on clothing, person on person, head violently bashing against head and giving the two of us a headache – it didn't matter. I want it. I want it so, so badly. Just tell me, please… Tell me I'm alive. Let this one, _stupid _gesture tell me that I am alive, and that I can keep living.

To my despair, I fall through. Half my body whizzes through the guy, and the other half just tumbles through the girl. I fall to the ground, face smacking into the pavement, and they _quite literally _walk all over me. I stay there for a while and sigh. I guess it was too good to be true. But if I'm not quite dead, and I'm not quite alive, then what the hell am I? Am I… a conscious and a spirit? A spirit and a conscious? A… sponscious? Conspirit? Some other unusually stupid mix of words?

I lift my head to see the girl having stopped a few feet in front of my head. The guy keeps on walking, his hands in his pockets. It takes him a moment to realise that his friend has stopped. He turns around and tilts his head slightly, looking at the girl. He furrows his eyebrows, creasing a menacing scar that's running down the bridge of his nose, "What?"

She looks around dreamily, clearly in a daze. Her small hand is to her chest, as though she's suddenly been frightened. Her dress moves slightly as she turns. She's acting as though she hasn't heard a thing that the guy said. Clearly, the guy doesn't like it. He's tapping his foot, and it's like I can feel the vibrations from his shoe close by going _tap tap tap, through _my head.

She's looking for something.

"Aerith?" the guy questions slowly.

The Aerith girl turns wholly, and I can see her. I blink rapidly. Emerald green eyes shine in the sun, darting this way and that. Her long, plaited brown hair reaches for the ground, though it's held back by a little red ribbon. Now, in both my _real _life and my _Nobody _life, I've seen plenty of women. And damn, she is _cute. Very _cute in fact. If not 'cute', then definitely 'pretty'.

And she's looking directly at me.

"Aerith? Is something wrong?" the guy asks once again. There's a hint of annoyance in his authority-stricken voice.

Her voice… It's so sweet, even as she looks away from me, "Someone is here."

Immediately, the man goes to grab his weapon from his side, "Where?"

"No no! Leon… put the gunblade away," she remarks, turning again, raising one hand. He compromises and strolls over to stand next to her. As he moves, she continues to speak, "I mean, I feel a presence here. Definitely a male."

I'm a male! She must mean me!

Okay, wait a second Axel, _calm the fuck down._

Leon smirks slightly and raises his eyebrows. Brushing such cockiness aside, and quickly, he speaks. His words sound sarcastic, but he's not trying to be. It's probably just the way he is, "Yuffie did mention you were gifted with ghosts."

Alright, so scar-face over here has given me a… term. I'm not a sponscious or a conspirit – I'm a _ghost. _

Floating dead person. Casper.

Well… not really _Casper… _Unless I've had a name change and I haven't realised it.

Aerith's gaze drifts over my body and all around. It's as though she's trying to pin point the origin of the ghost. Mainly, where I am. And so far, she's doing a pretty decent job of it. Not one hundred percent perfect, not a complete failure, but roughly around the middle of the scale. She twists the end of her hair around her finger, "Is someone here?"

"Yeah!" I answer, standing to my feet, hoping to catch her attention. Can she see? Or can she only hear, or feel?

"Hello?"

"Hello! Right here!" I wave my hand rapidly in front of her face.

"Anybody?"

"God dammit woman," I growl, "Right in front of you!"

She stumbles back slightly, and for a moment I can feel… Feel? Well… whatever this is inside of me, it _feels _like what hope used to feel like when I was alive. Maybe because I'm fully dead now… Maybe I do have a heart again. Maybe what I feel inside, churning in my stomach and in my chest-area _is actually _an emotion. Maybe I _am_ hoping.

"Did you hear me?" I ask desperately. I move to grab her shoulders, "Hey, did you hear me?!"

My hands fall right through her body, and I sigh, but I still hold onto that thin ray of hope. Aerith looks to Leon and bites her lip slightly, before turning away and walking off again, "I guess… maybe I misunderstood things. There's probably nothing there anyway, or I'm imagining that there is. Oh well, my mistake."

I sigh again and slam my hand against my head, defeated. I was unheard.

But it's her next statement that brings back some hope, "Come on Leon, let's go visit Sora. He, Donald, Goofy, Riku, Kairi and the King have arrived at Merlin's House after they defeated Xemnas. They were brought to Radiant Garden by the new gummi ship. We need to make sure they're okay and everything."

"They'll be fine," Leon drawls, following after his friend.

I stand a little taller and follow after them. Sora's here. And in Sora is Roxas.

Maybe he can help me out here.

* * *

"Ah, welcome!" some happy-go-lucky voice chimes.

I look around me, trying to find the source of the obnoxious noise. It's the ninja chick with short, black hair. At the sound of her voice, everyone in the room turns to look at Leon and Aerith entering. Leon leans against the closed door and flicks his head at their company – obviously his form of a greeting. She waves at them all, a gracious smile on her face.

I scan the rest of the company as they begin to interact, looking for the Keyblade's Chosen One desperately. Old man, an even older man, a guy with spiky hair, a chick with… with… with knockers that are the size of Kingdom Hearts!

Holy _shit!_

…Ahem …Moving on.

Three teeny, tiny fairies, a kingly mouse (what?), a guy with silvery hair, Donald, Goofy, Kairi –

And the guy himself.

I make my way towards Sora, who is blushing at the attention and scratching his chubby cheek. He's standing near the back, between the silver-haired guy and Kairi. Both are smiling at him, and soon enough, his voice fills the whole house, recounting his tales of battle against Organisation XIII and the Heartless. Everyone's hanging on his every word, and Donald and Goofy are pitching in where necessary.

These people, they've all lived through the war. They've had to fight to defend themselves, and they've had to watch others suffer. But still, none of them were at the centre of the whole thing like he was. And so they listen, to transport themselves into his shoes, or to ease their own horrors and worries. But no matter how hard they try, they won't truly experience what he's been through. And for that, they feel sorry for him.

For _all _of them.

Sora and his battles, with Donald and Goofy. Kairi and her capture. Silver-haired guy (whose name is Riku, apparently) and his fight with the darkness inside his own heart. The kingly mouse (King Mickey) who had to hide constantly.

I'm standing beside Sora now, slouching to get closer to his level. I'm near his ear, wondering how I'm possibly going to communicate with Roxas. Roxas is a part of Sora. Sora is a part of Roxas. Roxas is half or Sora, Sora is half of Roxas… I wonder, does Roxas control an arm or something? If I talk in his left ear, will I be talking to _Roxas _or to _Sora? _Does Roxas even _have _a side to call his own? Or has he just been stashed away in his brain somewhere where I possibly can't get to it?

…That'd be fuckin' right.

I raise my right hand and move to poke the idiot. Sadly, my finger goes through him, just like my whole body went through Leon and Aerith. But as it does, it's the first time I actually _looked _at my hand. At _myself. _I haven't seen myself at all since this whole charade began. Since… since I became a ghost. I wonder how long it's actually been since I've died. I mean, they're telling the battles and showing their scars so difficulty… Maybe it's not that long.

Back to the point. My hand is see-through. Transparent. And as I look down to my feet, so is the rest of my body.

It's like I've been blacked out or something.

I gather my voice, "Sora?"

No response. Good. Fine. I can work with that.

"Roxas!"

No response.

And I try again, "Roxas?"

Nothing.

And again, "_Roxas!_"

Nothing.

Crap…

But Sora stops, and I hold my breath. He cocks his head to the left slightly and raises a thin, brown eyebrow, looking around the small area that encompasses me. I bite my lip fiercely, so fiercely that it stings, and I hope, just _hope and pray and want and need and _everything else that I can possibly muster in my ghostly mind, soul and… heart?

"Sora?" Kairi inquires.

"Sorry," he says sheepishly, scratching the back of his head, embarrassed, "I got side tracked. Anyway, as I was saying, the three of us got to this funky… purpley… greeny… place, apparently called Betwixt and Between. It was an interesting place, it had all these little Nobody symbols floating around and everything. I was thinking at the time 'this has _gotta _be the entrance to The World That Never Was'. And whaddya know? It was! But it was so big and endless and stuff. We couldn't see an entrance or anything. And that's when an army of Dusk Nobodies showed up."

Ninja Girl looks alarmed, "What did you guys do?"

"We started fighting them of course!" Goofy says.

"But we couldn't take them. No matter how hard we tried, we couldn't take them," Sora remarks slowly. He looks down to his pockets and shoves a hand in the one closest to me, fishing through his endless assortment of keychains for his keyblades, "And that's when the most unlikely of help came up and started kicking butt. Seriously, I had no idea that he'd rock up and help us out."

And they pulled out the chakra keychain, dangling from his fingers. The one I gave them.

Sora doesn't speak. He just stares at it, a frown on his face. Donald speaks for him, "Axel, from Organisation XIII."

Everyone looks alarmed and shocked. What, did they think that I had gone to drag them into the castle, beat them with what was left of Demyx's sitar and then leave them for Xemnas to kill? I hate Xemnas! I'm not _that _damn heartless! Just because I didn't have a heart… and because I was fighting Heartless all the time… Shut up.

Sora brings the keychain closer towards him and holds it in both hands, as though it's something precious to him. He looks at it fondly, tracing the edges, "He helped us get rid of all of them, by fire or by just fighting. In the end he had exhausted himself so much that he… died. But it was thanks to him that we got to the World That Never Was. He opened the portal for us, told us where Kairi was… We owe him."

I smile sadly.

"If he was still alive…" he trails off, clenching the keychain in a way that is un-Sora-like, but very Roxas-like.

And for a brief moment, I see Roxas, not Sora, standing there. In Kairi's place, I see Naminé.

They turn to look at me. I remain motionless and stare. They smile. I don't.

They disappear, and both Sora and Kairi have a hand to their head. Aerith looks amongst them, "What's wrong?"

"Blah… Just a headache, don't worry about it!" Sora chimes, laughing it off.

Aerith furrows her eyebrows and looks to Sora's left. If I didn't know any better, I'd say she was looking at Kairi. But, considering where her line of sight is, she's not. Kairi comes up to my waist. She's certainly not looking there. She's looking _at me, again, _directly where my face is. Her eyes widen slightly, but she drops it and clears her throat, "Continue."

If I didn't know any better, I'd say she knows I'm around.

Maybe my way to communicate _isn't _through Roxas. Maybe it's through her. Little Miss I'm-Good-With-Ghosts.

Defeated and with nothing else to do, I simply sit on the nearby table and listen to Sora recount his adventures.

* * *

It's night time in Radiant Garden. Everyone's gone to sleep, including the visitors. Everyone except me.

I continue to wander around the place, observing it. This used to be the stronghold for the Heartless, hey? Doesn't look like a bad place. There's that giant castle off in the distance, a couple of markets here and there, and it's generally a friendly place. Or seems like it, anyway. There's… nothing really bad here. It's peaceful since the place has been cleansed of darkness. All that does is make me wonder what it was like beforehand.

I look down to the stones, and see a small puddle directly before me. Curious, I squat down and look into it, hoping to see my reflection. And I do, but it's so faint and wavering that I don't really know if it's worth it. But I'm there. This isn't a dream. I'm a ghost. And I can see myself. And I certainly don't look happy. Why would I be happy? I'm trapped between the world of the living and the world of the dead.

Why couldn't someone _choose _one or the other _for _me? I'm well aware I'm not pulling the strings on my own existence.

I stand once more and wander away. Just aimlessly wandering, thinking about what the hell I'm going to do to either get me to _live _again… or to get me to _die _properly.

I turn the corner, and I see Aerith standing there, looking out towards the castle. I guess she didn't go to sleep after all. I stand next to her and observe her curiously, noticing the black jacket that was snugly on her form. It was Leon's. She must've taken it when he went to sleep, or something. Come to think of it, it _is _kinda windy. Must be cold for her or something.

Helplessly, I sigh and wave my hand in front of her face, "Hello?"

"Hi."

I jump back.

She turns her head towards me, where the noise was coming from, "Sorry, didn't mean to scare you."

"I thought you couldn't hear me before, or see me," I mutter, frustrated.

"I could hear you," she says, "But I had to be sure. I can't see you though… Hopefully I'll be able to soon. But tell me, who are you?"

"Axel," I say.

She smiles, "I thought so."

"You have to help me," I remark, folding my arms, looking back towards the castle.

"I figured you'd need guidance. Like a compass directing you to one way, instead of standing still between destinations."

"Yeah."

She pressed her hands together and looked back towards the castle, silent.

"Can you help?"

"I think I can."


	2. Chapter 2

Author's Note: Wow. I came back to this story before _"Rising Sun" _o.o… Oh well. Enjoy this chapter, I had a lot of fun writing it. It's good to be churning out chapters that I'm pleased with (which is not the situation with some other works at the moment). Anyway, enjoy!

* * *

_**2.**_

"A ghost, you say?" he murmurs, thoughtfully curling his long, white beard around his claw-like fingers. He's leaning back in his wooden seat, his glasses falling down his crooked nose; as he stares at Aerith, "How peculiar. I've never heard of a Nobody, no matter how strong, become a ghost at the end of their time. Are you sure that it isn't another ghost toying with your powers, my dear?"

Aerith nods firmly, looking at the table idly, "I'm sure it's him. There's just this… presence about him that fits _exactly _with what Sora said yesterday. I'm so sure, Merlin."

Its early morning. I'm standing behind my ticket into life (or full death), listening intently as they speak about me amongst themselves. Some of the old man's comments have me scowl, as though I'm some impostor. Sorry gramps, but there's only _one _Axel, and that's _me. _No one can imitate my _voice _let alone my awesome act and my fighting style.

"You need to be absolutely positive," Merlin remarks, leaning forward. He pushes the tips of his fingers together. He pauses and inclines his head slightly, his lanky, blue hat falling forward as he does so, "Maybe there's a way that you can see him?"

"Why not use your magic? You are a powerful magician."

He chuckles, "But not strong enough for that, I'm afraid."

"Maybe I can get my hands on the keychain he gave to Sora before he died," she suggests, sitting up a little straighter, proud of her sudden idea, "Normally it's a lot easier to communicate with the fallen if there's an item of theirs in your hand. The energy signal is so much stronger when that happens. Maybe then I can see him and be certain."

"It's worth a try. Sora's sleeping upstairs. The keychains are in his pocket. Try not to wake him or the others."

Nodding slightly, she stands and moves. I follow behind her, hovering close. I don't know this house, but she does.

Soon enough, we're at the bedroom. I walk through the door hurriedly and glance around, seeing not only Sora sleeping in the room, but Kairi, Riku, Donald, Goofy and King Mickey. They're all sound asleep, unmoving and… _damn _Sora can snore. I wonder how the others put up with it, especially now. Maybe they're just _that _tired and exhausted.

I hover towards the brunette, noticed that he is still dressed in his day clothes. He's lying flat on his back, his mouth open slightly, drool crawling from the corner of his mouth. I roll my eyes, and it's as I do, I notice an assortment of keychains sitting on the bedside table. Surprised, I lean closer, looking around, and I see the miniature chakram. Raising my voice, I call to Aerith, "They're not on him, they're on the table next to him. I can see the keychain, I'll bring it out."

She says nothing, afraid of waking them all up. Clearing my throat and straightening up, I swiftly move my hand to the pile, hoping to sweep off all of these keychains, like the silver Mickey-head, the bottle and the black crown. Sadly, nothing happens, and then I remember that I can't touch _anything. _With a growl, I try again, concentrating all of my energy on pushing the keychains off. I can feel my will, my desire surging through my spirit, even as I concentrate it onto my finger. This has _gotta _work.

Three, two, one, _go!_

…Aaaand it goes through.

Growling, I call to Aerith again, "I can't get it. I keep forgetting I'm a stupid ghost. You're gonna have to come in."

The door creaks open. I fold my arms and take a few steps back from the pile, looking to my transparent feet. In the movies, ghosts can touch things and influence decisions. Surely here in the real world, I can do the same thing. I should be able to haunt them not only with my general presence and my voice, but with touch and things moving… like a lamp.

Aerith drags out the keychain from underneath the pile and observes it, her fingers going around the edges. She holds it in both hands and brings it to her chest, looking down to the ground, her toes curling within her sandals slightly. She softly murmurs, shuddering at the cool temperature, amongst other things, "I can feel you in this. It is so strong…"

I say nothing and merely stand there.

She turns, her brown hair bouncing, and looks to where I am standing, which is behind her. Her eyes widen slightly as she takes in the whole of my form, from my black boots to my spiky, red hair. She's shocked yet so pleased that it was indeed _me _she was seeing and not anyone else. I can see her going over Sora's earlier descriptions in her mind, before she cracks a smile, causing me to smile slightly as well.

"It's you," she whispers, turning wholly, "It really is you."

"The one and the only," I deadpan, turning away hurriedly, "Let's get back downstairs to Merlin."

As I walk through the wall, and as she goes through the door, I hear some rustling behind me. Aerith continues to move downstairs, and I remain standing where I am, in the middle of a wall. I look amongst the room, trying to see who was creating the noise. All of them are practically dead to the world, barely moving or breathing, but it's out of the corner of my eye that I see Sora's foot twitch. Scratch that, his entire damn leg moved. He's awake. He rolls over, and his azure eyes open like harshly pulled blinds.

And like last night, he fades, and I see Roxas in his place. As he sits up and stretches, he rubs his eyes, which flicker one way then another. They land on me, and they stay there. He doesn't smile this time, but I do, inclining my head slightly as I do so. A sudden realisation seems to dawn on his face, as though he wasn't imagining things yesterday evening; and I turn away, going back downstairs as Sora comes back into proper view, staring at the wall intently.

"It's him," Aerith says to Merlin. She hasn't even sat down yet, and she continues to clutch the keychain, "It really is him, Merlin. The black attire, the height, the thinness, the flaming, spiky hair, the emerald eyes and the dark purple tear drops on his cheeks… Just like Sora said! Even the unintentional cocky look on his face, it is him!"

Unintentional cocky look on my face? _Excuse _me? Sora told you that? Who does he think he –

The look on the wizard's face is undoubtedly sceptical.

It does not deter the flower girl. She slams her hands on the table, feeling an unusual surge of confidence as she speaks. Her determination burns bright, almost as bright as the flames I was once capable of producing in the palm of my hand, "I am _not lying! He _is _not lying! _It really is him! Why would I lie to you…?"

I feel sorry for her. She's trying so hard to help me, and no one believes her. I lift my head a little, and behind her, I see Leon, his arms folded as he stops walking; and stands in the far, dark corner. Behind me, I hear footsteps, and see that it is the Keyblade Master, lumbering down the stairs in a sleepy mess. He rubs his eye once more and silently yawns.

Aerith is oblivious to both individuals and carries on, "In this house, Axel, Number VIII of Organisation XIII, stands as a ghost who is looking for help to either walk amongst us, or walk amongst the beaches of his afterlife. He's standing at the last step watching us right now, with his arms folded across his chest, hoping that somehow, he can be helped. He is not our enemy, Merlin. Our enemy is vanquished, and if it weren't for him, we would all be overrun by our former opponents. You owe him this. _We all _owe him this!"

"Aerith…" I murmur, noticing that she stops talking for a moment, "That's enough."

She obeys my suggestion and stands upright, still clenching the keychain. Her eyes still burn with the determination to help me, and it is behind those orbs do I see true kindness. This woman has a heart of gold, untainted by the horrors that she has had to live through. In all the hearts I've seen and in all the hearts I've harvested with my own two hands… this is a rarity. I see little to no darkness in her heart, and in that, she is second only to the Princesses Of Heart.

It seems that Sora's come out of his sleepy state. He speaks, his voice completely alive, "Are you serious?!"

Her head snaps towards him. She pulls the keychain a little closer towards her, "Sora?"

Leon opens his mouth too, "So it wasn't your imagination."

She turns to see her friend and feels surrounded and outdone. She looks down and nods firmly, answering both of them with her gesture, before speaking to Merlin again, "Please tell me there is _something _you can do for him. I cannot imagine what it feels like to be amongst the living, yet unable to interact as freely as he once could."

Yeah, it does suck.

The wizard bows his head down slightly, "There is nothing that I myself can do…"

The hope I formerly had is sucked out of me. I look down also.

"…but I _can _point you in the right direction."

Both Aerith and I look up at him. The hope I had is thrust back into me, and drowning in it, I run over towards my so-called 'interpreter', talking at a million miles an hour, "Really? Aw man, I owe you! If I score my way back into life, remind me to make you a cake. Tell me, where do I need to go? What do I need to do to stop being in between places?"

Aerith chuckles, placing a hand over her mouth. She looks amongst them all and speaks, "He's happy."

Merlin grins, pushing himself off his seat. The wood scrapes over the stone floor, "I am a magician – wise, old and resourceful. But I am not the best that there is…" He turns to look to Sora, pointing at him gingerly, "You have been across so many worlds and seen so many people, and you surely know that fact…" He looks back to Aerith, "I am of course speaking of Yen Sid."

Sora, who is now standing near table, nods rapidly, "Yeah, he trained the King himself!"

He chuckles a little, "Yes yes, of course. I would tell you to go to Ansem The Wise, however he is no longer among us; so the next best option, so to say, is Yen Sid. You can only get to him from Twilight Town. There is a train station there, and a particular train that will take you up to his home. Of course, one would have to be extra patient to see it arrive. Of course, there are still a few stray Nobodies running around that world, so I believe it would be best to have some company, my dear."

"I'll go," Leon says, unfolding his arms.

"Me too! You'll need _someone _who has some experience in flying the Gummy Ship," Sora remarks, excited, "I want to help Axel in any way I can. It's the least I can do after what he did for us."

I smile.

"And… for Roxas too," he adds, looking to the stairs where I was formerly, like Aerith had remarked.

My smile grows. Roxas is still there. My best friend is still there. Sora hasn't let him fade away into oblivion.

Aerith bows graciously to the three of them, "Thank you. We'll go right away."

A grumble disturbs the area. All heads, including my own, snap to Sora, whose hand is now placed over his stomach. A bashful look on his youthful face. He scratches his cheek and clears his throat, ignoring the persistent rumbles of his stomach, "Sorry."

She smiles, "Right after breakfast, then."

* * *

"I haven't been to Twilight Town in so long…" Sora murmurs, his hands stretched behind his head. He walks up the stairs swiftly, hesitating on each foot as though to entertain himself a little. He looks into the coming window, seeing his own reflection, and smiles slightly, "I wonder if Hayner, Pence and Olette are enjoying school."

"Maybe you should go back to school and find out for yourself," Leon grumbled, shaking his head. At that, I chuckle slightly.

Aerith's slender arms hold onto a sturdy red jacket, which she carries in front of her. Clipped to the front of her dress, just above the little bow, is the keychain I gave Sora. It was suggested by the fifteen-year-old himself that she keep it with her at all times, to make sure that she is in constant contact with me. She smiles at the two of them, bringing up the rear of the trio, and looks over her shoulder, looking at me.

She notices that I've stopped walking and am looking down. I speak after a few moments, "It's… been a while since I've been here too. This is the last place I saw Roxas, and its here that I stopped… 'being' a member of the Organisation."

"_Such is life, I guess," _she thinks, effectively speaking to me in private.

Yes, in private. As in, no one else can hear her except me. Schnazzy, eh?

We had been travelling on the Gummi Ship, and were trying to find a way to communicate to each other without Sora and Leon listening, and without making it seem like Aerith was some kind of weirdo. I mean sure, they'd understand, but what about other randoms we're bound to encounter in this journey? Yeah. So I suggested a couple of things, and this one worked. Of course, she can conceal her thoughts from me, but… yeah.

"Well," I say, coming out of my reflective state, "Life sucks."

I pass her hurriedly, and she says to me, _"So you would prefer to be wholly dead?"_

"Are you crazy?" I scoff, "Of course I wanna be alive."

"_Then why does life suck?"_

"You don't understand," I hiss vehemently, "You've still got your heart."

Without looking back, I pass Leon and Sora, walking through the doors of the station. It is isolated at this time of morning. I see no people, aside from the guy sitting behind the ticket booth, who is half asleep. I hear the door squeakily open behind me, guessing that Sora's entered the area. Judging by the rushed footsteps, I assume it is him going to get tickets.

Paying no mind to it, I look forward at the platforms. They are empty, aside from one, peculiar looking train. It is dark blue, almost purple in its primary colour; and is adorned with yellow stars. I furrow my eyebrows. That's not a normal train, there's no way that it is. And from where I'm standing at the moment, I don't see anyone inside it. Not even a driver.

Standing in place, I call over to the only person who can hear me, "Aerith, ask Sora if that's the train to Yen Sid's."

I hear her voice flow through timidly, and then Sora's surprised cry. He soon answers, "Yeah! It is!"

Leon's voice also sounds, "It looks like it's ready to leave."

"Well, come on then!" Aerith remarks, running forward, her brown boots pattering over the ground. I follow.

Leon also follows her, his running strides much larger. He passes her, jumping onto the slowly departing train, before holding his hand out to his female friend, helping her onto the carriage. He calls out to Sora, "Hey kid, hurry up!"

Sora nods rapidly, holding the tickets and remaining munny in his hand, before running over towards them too. Soon enough, he leaps onto the carriage, and the platform starts to shrink away as the doors close, holding us all in. With a sigh of relief, the Keyblade's Chosen One seats himself on the nearest chair, leaning back, hands behind his head once more, "That was a close one."

Silence binds us all as we travel to Yen Sid's. I want to say something to all of them, but I can't. I have my own individual questions for each. Why does Sora want to help me when I fought against him? Surely it's not because Roxas is forcing him. Roxas isn't like that. And he doesn't need to make it up to me or whatever, I _wanted _to open the damn portal and get him to exterminate Xemnas and the others, because I thought it had gone too far.

Why did Leon tag along? Is he just there to protect Aerith and Sora, or is he sick of staying behind?

From my sitting position next to Aerith, I look to her, _And you…?_

I lean forward, resting my arms on my thighs, and look straight ahead of me, staring into nothingness. The world outside of the carriage is like a perpetual blur of darkness, showing no signs of ending. It is uninteresting to me. My mouth slowly opens, and it forms words directed to the flower girl, "Aerith?"

"_Mm?" _she remarks, turning to look at me. Her placid face bears a smile.

"Why are you helping me?" I ask.

"_I want to,"_ she says, her smile widening.

Silence binds us again, pulling the chains tightly.

* * *

We stand in front of a large, winding staircase. Sora doesn't look happy to see it again. Leon's current expression is unreadable. Aerith doesn't seem to mind. I, however, am not looking forward to this ascent. Yes fine, I'm technically dead and shouldn't be able to get tired, but still happens!

Leon takes the first step and begins to climb. Not wanting to be left behind, the other two move as well, picking up the pace a little, as though it is a race. I follow them, only at a walking speed, watching them go along side the stoic warrior. Sora's still a kid, but Aerith's what… twenty something?

"_Aerith, how old are you?"_ I ask her randomly, privately, forming the sentence in my own head.

"_Twenty-two," _she answers from numerous stairs in front of me.

"_I see."_

So anyway, as I was saying… Sora's still a kid, so it's understandable as to why he's acting like a complete idiot. Aerith's twenty-two, she's not exactly a kid, so… it's… interesting, to say the least, to see her acting like a one. From what I've seen, she's undoubtedly a strong, mature woman; but she still has an innocent, child's heart deep down.

Lost in my thoughts, we end up at the top of the staircase. Leon raises his hand and taps on the door firmly. Before long, it opens, as though a strong wind pushed it open. The four of us enter, me at the back. I move to close the door behind me, before mentally growling at myself again. I _really _need to stop thinking that I'm alive and that I can touch things. I just can't do that anymore.

The three form a line, and I continue to stand behind them, specifically standing behind Aerith. Sora bows respectively to the man that sits behind his sturdy desk. Both Leon (albeit stiffly) and Aerith follow suit, greeting the magical wonder. After some silence, the Keyblade Master speaks, "It's good to see you again, Master Yen Sid."

"And you, Sora, and your comrades," he states, smiling slightly. He pauses, as though analysing all of them; and thereafter retracts his inspecting glare, merely looking at them, "So, what brings you three to my tower?"

At this address, Aerith steps forward, clasping her hands together, though this isn't obvious, because they're under her red jacket. She clears her throat and speaks firmly, her voice unwavering, "Master Yen Sid, we come to you for assistance. The weary battle against the Heartless and the Nobodies are far from over, but they are undoubtedly in our favour. We may as well consider the battle to be ours, for we have won, destroying the stronghold of the Heartless a year ago, and the stronghold of the Nobodies recently.

"As you know, Organisation XIII has been annihilated. Roxas lives on in Sora, and all others have been destroyed. However, amongst them all, there is a Nobody who helped us considerably. He got Sora into the World That Never Was, and without that assistance he provided, the worlds would not be the same. I speak of Number VIII, Axel."

"The Flurry Of Dancing Flames," Yen Sid murmurs, leaning back, "Go on."

"You see," she begins, looking to the goofball on her left, "He was never wholly bad. I'm not even sure if he was bad to begin with, considering the stories you've told us, Sora. But the fact of the matter is, Sora could not have destroyed Xemnas and brought peace to the worlds if Axel didn't open that portal. He took out a considerable amount of Nobodies in the process, helping out even further. In the attack… he died. But he's not wholly dead.

"As confusing as this all sounds… Master Yen Sid, on behalf of Axel, I come to you to ask for assistance. He stands in between the world of the living, and the afterlife. Ironic, considering where he passed on. I was wondering if you would be able to help what is left of his spirit cross over into one or the other. Either to walk amongst us all again, or to die peacefully, and not be stuck."

There's a considerable amount of silence after she made my plea. I become worried for a moment, holding my breath, and like the others in the room, await for him to speak. I'm holding onto all of my hope here. Surely he can do something to help me.

Soon enough, he speaks, and it feels as though my chest has suddenly become tighter… as though I'm holding onto my breath more and more with every passing moment, "Tell me, lady… Why should we help someone who has opposed us for so long? Why should we help someone who has brought death, horror and destruction to the innocent? Why should we help someone who has thieved hearts from these innocents, for his own sick purpose? I say, let him suffer."

Anger flares in the pit of my stomach. I forget for a moment that as a Nobody, I'm not supposed to feel.

"But Master Yen Sid…" Aerith stutters.

"I have spoken," he growls.

My growl surpasses his in volume as I explode, "What, you think I _wanted _to kill those people?! If I could've found some other way to restore my heart, to get it _back _after it was ripped from me, I would've! But there was _no _other way, and even then I was _made_ to!You sit there in your little chair, all high and mighty, throwing around all these flashy spells; but you have _no _idea what its like being pushed around like a servant, because _you _are the one pushing! Let _me _suffer?! I'm starting to wish someone came and stole _your _heart! _Then _you'll know the _true _meaning of the word 'suffering'!"

Unbeknownst to me, everything I said is heard by all of them. Sora's azure eyes are wide open, as he looks around the room, trying to find me. Leon's holding his head in his hand, shaking it, as though to say 'you're an idiot for challenging him'. Aerith is surprised at the other's expressions, now aware that for some reason, in this tower, I can be heard. She is looking at me. Yen Sid's eyes narrow dramatically, as he too searches for the source of the sound within the room.

"Number VIII," he states icily, "Reveal yourself to us."

"Shit, you heard all that?" I remark, surprised.

"Yes," he answers, "This tower is quite special. I do not practice my 'flashy spells' for no reason. Reveal yourself."

"I can't!" I say, throwing my hands around, "I'm just a bunch of freaking uncoordinated particles! I can see myself, and Aerith can see me, but that's it. No one else can, and as far as I'm concerned, none of you guys except Aerith should be able to hear me, and this is all just one crazy dream; and I'm gonna pinch myself and I'll wake up from it now."

I stay true to my word, and indeed pinch my left arm. I cry out in slight pain before stamping my foot in frustration and sighing, leaning forward. Aerith chuckles at me. I look up and furrow my eyebrows, thereafter rolling my eyes at her amusement; and stand up straight once again, crossing my arms.

Yen Sid's hand ascends to a horizontal level. His hand is outstretched, his fingers spread. His level voice increases in volume slightly, bouncing between the stone walls, "If you cannot show yourself, then I shall show you. From here on in, within this tower, you are visible to all people, no matter who they are or where their true alliance lies."

He turns his hand, his fingers coming together as he does so in a swift motion. I jump slightly, watching bright, glowing red light surround me. The beams are shooting straight up, the tips of which tower a few feet over me. I look to Aerith, who appears to be worried, before looking away, shielding my eyes as it brightens, blinding me, making it impossible to see.

"_Tell me when it's over,"_ I say to her.

And I wait. And wait. And wait. And wait. And –

"_It's over."_

I lower my arms and open my eyes, no longer seeing the light show, and look amongst them all. Aerith is still smiling. Sora looks beyond pleased, bordering psychotically ecstatic. Leon's eyes are simply roaming over my form, observing his friend's former enemy. Yen Sid looks pleased with his work. Unsure of what to do next, I merely straighten up slightly and wave at them all, "Hi."

"You were right, Sora," Leon smirks, "He is lanky."

I point my finger at Leon. My other hand clenches, "You shut up."

Yen Sid presses his fingers together and looks down his nose at me, "So, Number VIII… What is the meaning of 'suffering'?"

The corner of his mouth twitches into a smirk, challenging me. My eyes narrow dangerously.


	3. Chapter 3

Author's Note: And again, back before doing "Rising Sun" XD I'm seriously thinking of abandoning that fic, lol. Anyway, thanks for your support guys, its appreciated! Enjoy the third (and shorter) chapter!

* * *

_**3.**_

I like challenges.

Sadly, for this challenge, I am unable to retort. How am I gonna teach a wizard, a bloody spell-shooting, potion-brewing _wizard, _the meaning of 'suffering'? There's just no way that I… that I can even fathom the mental image, let alone formulate a plan. What am I gonna do, reach out and pimp smack him or something? That'd be an epic fail and it wouldn't even get my damn point across.

I look down, feeling defeated. What am I going to do? Should I just… speak from the heart or something equally as cheesy?

"I'm waiting, Number VIII," Yen Sid states icily, drumming his fingers on the desk.

I lift my head and cross my arms, "Alright, look. I'm not gonna pretend I know everything, and if you really know me, then you'd know that I suck at explanations. Just ask Roxas, if you somehow can get to him through Sora – I totally suck. But um… I'm trying to make my case here. I'm not the definition of 'villain', and I never was. I'm not exactly the definition of 'good boy' either… As selfish as it was, I was trying to do what was right for _me. _I was trying to fix _myself. _Animals, when cornered, will always fight their way out. I felt cornered so, I fought my way out I guess, even if it really hurt other people.

"Hearts are important and all…" I sound like a fucking broken record, as my hand rises to my chest and my head lowers again, "And… it does hurt not having one, though I technically shouldn't feel it. But… Um… Shit."

"_Try and get down to his level," _Aerith suggests.

I take in her words, and look up, "…See it this way, Yen Sid. How would you feel if somehow you lost your magical gifts, powers and capabilities? It'd hurt like a little bitch. But aside from that, you wouldn't feel the same right? It'd be like there's a hole inside of you that you can never fill, no matter what you do to try and… fill it up again… You'd be looking everywhere to mend yourself, trying _every_ method you can think of, only to find yourself in the same place as you started. You wouldn't have moved forward or back, and it hurts. It taxes the soul, let alone your heart and mind… and _that _is suffering. And that is what I feel."

Still feeling small and weak beneath his emotionless gaze, I look to Aerith for some form of comfort. She smiles slightly, and in return, I smile back, grateful for her support. It leaves my face soon enough. I look to my hands, still seeing them as transparent imagery; and tug at my right glove, pulling it down a little, only using it as something to fiddle with before I completely cave in and start getting on my knees and begging for his damn help.

Yen Sid's booming voice scares the living daylights out of me, "There is a way."

Sora emits a high-pitched 'yes'. Aerith bows gratefully. I let go of the breath I wasn't even aware I was holding. Leon does nothing.

He looks at me firmly, "You will have to go on a small quest to be able to bring yourself back to life, or further into death. Your quest will commence here, and it may end here, but the pivotal point will be on another world. Beneath the Olympus Coliseum is the Underworld, the entry point for the fallen. Within the underworld is the River Styx, which is where you must go. It is heavily guarded and nobody can pass through without three keys. Hades has one. Another is thought to be in Radiant Garden. The third, however, I have no idea. Fortunately, they are all… 'attracted' to each other, so to say. You can use one like a tracking device to find another. This… _gate _is only a recent addition, however, and it was installed to prevent the Nobodies from entering, for that place was heavily targeted during the war.

"From here, Number VIII, you have two options. You could dive into the river itself, essentially returning your soul to where it should have been, and accept death wholly. As for life… collect a bottle full of the river's water, and bring it here. With my magic, I will reverse its effects. So to say, rather than complete your death from coming into contact with the water, you will be restored to life, and you may continue on your merry way. Furthermore, with this revival, your heart is restored," his expression darkens for a moment, and the goofy, happy smile on my face completely drops off, "However, I must ask, what will you do if you return to the land of the living?"

I hesitate, unsure, "To be honest… I don't know."

"Perhaps some community service is in order then," he growls, "to repair the damage you have done."

"Okay. What would you have me do?" I inquire.

He chuckles, "I am not sure, yet… I will think of a befitting punishment as you go about your journey," he turns to Aerith, "My dear, you must accompany him and make sure that he does not get out of hand. After all, you are the only one who is able to see him outside of my home…" and then to Leon, "Your services will not be needed, so whether you want to go or not is entirely of your decision…" and then to Sora, "and you, Sora… Do you think you are ready for one more adventure?"

Sora nods firmly, still smiling, "I know I am."

"Then you also must go with Aerith not only to protect her, but to get her to the worlds in question, so that she may locate the keys. Oh and Sora, before you ask… no, your keyblade will not work on this gate. Why, I am not sure myself, but do not waste your time. Hades, although a hothead, is very clever," he turns to me again, looking down his nose at me, "I am only doing this because I believe that Sora and his friends would not lead me astray. If he trusts you, then I should as well, albeit grudgingly. You do not seem like a true enemy to me, but I wonder if there were others like you in the Organisation."

"Only two," I say, frowning, "Demyx and Roxas. Demyx wasn't a fighter. He just wanted his heart back, that's all. He hated everything he did. And Roxas… was always questioning why he was doing things. He _knew_ he wasn't the same as us…" I look to Sora, "He knew that his heart was alive and beating."

Yen Sid smirks a little, "I see. Well, that is all I can do for you. It is time to leave. Oh, and Axel? Try and maintain your potty mouth around Sora. He _is _only fifteen."

---

"I feel blind and deaf at the moment," Sora grumbles, keeping his eyes on what was ahead of him in the Gummi Ship, "I had gotten _so _used to seeing and hearing Axel!"

Aerith smiles a little, "Well, he hasn't gone anywhere."

"Yeah," I state sarcastically, "It's not like I can walk out of this Gummi Ship and just stay floating outside."

Sora spins the steering wheel, avoiding another asteroid. This kid's had way too many close calls with these damn asteroids. Be glad its not _you _whose sitting – or standing – in this ship with him. He asks, "So Leon, are you gonna come with us?"

"No," he replies sternly. He smirks a little, his cheeks rising and partially covering his steely eyes, "I have to head the committee, and I know you'll take good care of Aerith and yourself. You guys don't need anyone else weighing the quest down. Aerith can cast spells if necessary, and you, Sora, are more than a capable fighter and magician. You'll do just fine, I have faith in both of you."

"A compliment from Mister Grumpy," I mutter. Aerith chuckles.

"What?" Leon asks.

"Nothing," she singsongs, looking at me.

Minutes pass.

"We're here," Sora states, slowing the Gummi Ship to a stop.

Radiant Garden towers around us.

---

I'm currently standing outside of Merlin's house, snapping my finger every so often, watching as an ember appears on the tip of my index finger. It hovers around momentarily, before fading into oblivion. I snap my fingers again, watching it reappear, and in a bored fashion, I move my hand around, watching the tail of the flame trail behind it. Inside, the three are briefing the others, telling them what's going to happen and so on and so forth; and telling them about the keys.

You know, it would've been better if we had a clue as to what the keys looked like.

The flame goes out, and I relight it. It'd probably be gold, or like… a rusty grey colour; and it'd have like, the symbol of the Underworld on it or something… or even the symbol of the Gods, or that big buffy dude, Hercules. His symbol's like a thunderbolt or something, right? And better yet, if Sora defeated Hades, then where's the key? Hades may still be alive, but if he's not, then where is the damn thing?

This… whole ordeal is a lot more complicated than Yen Sid originally made it out to be. Come to think of it, he was kinda sketchy on the details, and this just makes things a lot harder for us and all, you know? And then I have to get _punished _at the end of all of this just because… just because I wanted to make myself better. Just because I _still _want to make myself better.

"Hey, Axel?"

Sora wanders out, just as I make another ember on my finger. I look to the kid, watching as he gawks.

"…What the hell?! Axel, if that's you playing with fire, cut it out, because I can see it and its creepy!"

I smirk slightly and raise my other hand, making the fire bigger. His azure eyes widen, watching as swiftly, I cultivate a word out of the flames very carefully, and move it in front of his face. With a few final adjustments, I grin, watching as his face morphs into an annoyed expression at the word.

"Yeah. 'Boo'. Very funny, Axel. Clever, in fact," he hisses. It then occurs to him that he can see what I wrote to him, "Oh wow! This might be a way to communicate."

I put out the fire that spelt 'boo', and I quickly make another one saying 'No shit, Sora.'

He rolls his eyes as the fire fades away. Looking at where I am standing, but not being able to actually _see _me, he says, "Anyway, listen… We're doing a bit of research on these keys. According to Jiminy, they're like a dark silver colour with a flaming skull at the handle. Now that we know this, Aerith and I are gonna come out soon and start looking around the place for the one here. So uh… yeah. I'll leave you alone now."

He heads back inside, and I follow, finally bored of the outside. I see Cid sitting at his large computer, still researching. Beside him, Yuffie is taking down notes, and Mickey, Donald and Goofy are instructing him on where to go next. Riku and Kairi are welcoming Sora back, Leon and Cloud are briefly chatting, and Merlin and Tifa are simply watching over the entire scene.

I see Aerith standing in the back corner, looking at the keychain in her hands. She runs her fingers around the item, obviously in thought. With nowhere else to go and no one else to talk to, I gravitate over to her and cross my arms over my chest, peering down at her, _"What are you doing?"_

"_This is such a nice design," _she says to me, _"This was your weapon looked like, according to Sora."_

"_Weapons," _I correct, _"I had two chakrams in that style. They were very handy."_

"_I see," _she remarks, turning to face me, _"And just what are you doing inside?"_

"_I'm bored. Came to see what's going on."_

"_Oh. Well, we're just checking a few more things before going to look around the area. Tron should be due back with the information at any moment."_

"_Tron?"_

"_He's this… little man inside of the computer," _she explains, smiling a little, _"He's our friend."_

"_A little man inside of a computer," _I crow, _"What's next, a lion?"_

"_Well, there _is _Simba…"_

I smack my head, _"Never mind."_

A few beeps are sounded in quick succession. My head snaps towards the computer, and there's a man standing in the middle of the screen, pointing at some pictures above him. It's the key, or what it's assumed to look like. He then says, "I advise looking around in dark places, probably near where the castle was. It might be buried a little, so keep a sharp eye out. That's all you'll need at the moment. I'll come back soon with information on where the second key is."

"Thank ya, Tron!" Mickey chimes.

Tron salutes before disappearing again.

Sora looks to Aerith, "Ready to go?"

She nods, "Yes."

"Axel, wherever you are… Ready?"

"It's not like I can answer," I snit. Sometimes Sora can be _so _stupid –

"Let's go then!"

---

We started first by looking around in corners of the town square. No such luck. After that, we moved to the bailey. Nothing there either, aside from a trio of annoying little fairies that I would like to burn alive and thereafter stamp on their charred remains –

…God damn annoying little whining bitches.

Currently, we're in a large, open field. The ground is completely flat, aside from a few bumps here and there. If we keep moving northwards, then we're gonna run into this large castle, which is being rebuilt, and was the former home of the Heartless' second in command, Maleficent. Sora's telling us how he defeated one thousand Heartless in this very field alone, and without assistance.

I remember watching it too, from that cliff face over there. I gotta hand it to the kid, he's a good fighter.

On the way to this place, he told us about his fight with Demyx. He even pointed out where the battle took place, which was like in this corridor. It hurt to hear it, because Demyx was my friend. Aerith seemed to pick up on my feelings, and had told Sora to talk about something else. He apologised to me and then indeed found another topic.

"Nothing here," Aerith calls from her corner. She continues to walk around the outskirts of the field, keeping a sharp eye out for something shiny, "What about over there Sora?"

Sora's on his hands and knees, digging at a pile, believing that there's something underneath it. He's holding his breath, and he _really _looks like a dog with the way he's digging. I find it amusing, but sad at the same time. Eventually, he calls out, surprised, looks over his shoulder, puts his hands around the item in question, and screams, "I'VE FOUND IT!"

I grin, glad that after about an hour and a half of searching; he's found a key to my freedom, a key to my - …

"Sora…" I hiss, "You're holding a fucking _rock._"

Aerith chuckles, "Sora, you are holding a rock. That's not the key."

He looks at his hands and growls angrily, dumping it at his feet, before continuing his search, "I'm sorry."

I wryly turn my attention away from him. I'm up ahead of them both, keeping an eye out for anything shiny as well. I've passed a couple of bumps and tried to move the dirt off with my hands, only to remember that I can't do that. I even tried with fire, and it didn't get me very far. I _really _wish I knew how to move things with my hands, it'd make life so, so much easier. Like on T.V. and stuff, ghosts could move things with their hands. Why can't I?

Sighing in frustration, I remark to her, _"This is hopeless. Does Cid have a metal detector or something?"_

"_I don't think so," _Aerith answers. She nudges a pebble with her foot, briefly looking at me.

"_It'd make life easier."_

"_I know."_

After what seems like forever – but is really probably only another… twenty minutes or so, I give up and slump forward, tired. Aerith is still trying, as is Sora, but with my current energy, I just can't really handle this anymore. I'm exhausted.

Sora calls out again. His voice stabs my head, "GUYS! I FOUND IT, FOR REAL THIS TIME!"

The urgency in his tone tells me that he isn't bluffing. I turn to look, as does my 'interpreter'. My mouth drops as my emerald eyes take in the sight of the Keyblade Master clenching the first, silver skull key in his left, gloved hand.


	4. Chapter 4

Author's Note: So, a couple of months with no updates… Sorry about that. Been distracted by stuff. But here's your update guys, I hope you enjoy it. I'm glad you've enjoyed the story so far. Big thanks to _Casamora _for that very nice review. I'm very glad you like the plot, I really wanted to do something unique. And there are actually quite a few KH stories written from first POV. You just gotta search ;) Anyway, on with the story!

* * *

_**4.**_

Sora's holding the key in his large hand, looking down it. Aerith and I are looking at it too, curious and happy. But the question remains, how are we gonna find the other ones? There's so many worlds out there, does Yen Sid honestly expect us to grab the Gummy Ship and fly to each one and see if the damn thing glows? Pretty ridiculous, if you ask me, but as dumb as it sounds, I have a feeling that's what's gonna happen.

"So what now?" Sora asks, "Should we take it back to Merlin for safe keeping?"

"No, we should hold onto it so it can find the other keys on its own. But we need to think logically, there are too many worlds out there to just randomly hop around to. Sora, what world had the most 'keys'? Wasn't it Port Royal, the pirate world? You were always on about keys and little coins there…" she smiles a little, pulling a bunch of brown hair behind her ear.

He nods rapidly, "Yeah, they had lots of treasure and stuff there, all in this one, massive pile. Maybe we should check out that world before any of the others and then go from there. Hopefully luck is on our side!"

I palm my forehead. This kid's enthusiasm is poisonous in a good and bad way.

* * *

This place is a dump.

A complete and utter dump.

We're at the harbour. I look at the guy who is lying in front of my feet. He's sleeping, and his snores are so goddamn loud. His limbs are spread out everywhere and he keeps muttering something amidst his snores that I don't understand, and I'm not sure I _want _to understand it. I _do _know, though, that Sora and Aerith are boarding this giant ship. I also know that the 'Captain' of this ship is making numerous moves on Aerith, and that she doesn't like it, but is just generally ignoring it.

I step over the sleeping guy and also board the ship, feeling the boat move due to the waves. I hurry towards the side and look over at the hypnotic liquid, seeing myself again, as faint as I was before. Bored, I wave at myself, for some reason pleased that I wave back. I then rest my chin on my fist and watch the water pass by, just thinking, because that seems to be all I'm good at right now.

I'm glad that we're on this journey but I wonder if it's really worth it and all, you know? If I come back, what's not to say I'll be chased from here to Atlantica by any remaining Heartless and Nobodies? What's not to say that I'll be killed again by some random person, condemning me and hating me for taking away the heart of their loved one? What's not to say that I'll be happier alive with a heart than dead and lifeless? Can I honestly live after doing everything I've done? I've done enough in my time as a Nobody to suffice for a second life. Do I really want a third?

O-of course I do! Anything but this.

I jump when someone stumbles next to me, grabbing the edge of the rickety boat. I look to see its Aerith, holding the Bond of Flames keychain in one hand, and the wood with the other. She furrows her eyebrows and bends her knees, making it apparent that she's not really enjoying this trip and isn't very stable on the vessel. Unable to help myself, I chuckle and ask, "Seasick, are we?"

"Just a little," she murmurs, but she's loud enough so only I can hear. Smiling, she looks to me, "What're you thinking about?"

"Things," I reply.

"Such as?"

"Just 'things'."

She chuckles and turns, resting her back against the boat. She looks down at the keychain, inspecting it for the umpteenth time, and I wonder why she's so transfixed with the design. The soft wind ruffles her hair and her skirt, "I have a theory about you, Number VIII. You and your weapon are very alike," she holds it close to her and looks up to the glittering night sky, "You both have this hard, spiky outside, but on the inside, you really just want to be held."

"Your theories are strange, woman," I grumble.

Aerith smiles again, looking to me, "Perhaps… but the spikes on both of you are just a layer of defence. For your chakrams, it's to fight. In the centre is the handle. With you, this attitude is a layer of your defence, because inside, you're really broken or something, especially seeing as you don't have a heart. You want to be comforted for your abnormality, for what was ripped from you, I guess."

"Your theories are _very _strange, woman," I mutter again. A shame that she's kinda right, I guess.

Uneven footsteps get our attention. My head snaps up, and I see the Captain walking towards Aerith again, grinning, "Aerith my dear, you shouldn't stay up here in the cold. Come down to the cabin and have some dinner with Sora and I. Don't want you to catch a cold up here."

"Sure thing, Jack."

"_Captain _Jack," he remarks, slinging an arm around her and leading her away from the edge, "Captain of the Black Pearl."

She throws me a sympathetic smile and silently asks me to come with her. I abide, turning away from the water's edge, silently glaring daggers at 'Captain' Jack. His attitude is annoying. Then again, I find a lot of people annoying. As we descend the stairs, I hear him muttering something about being a _Captain, _again, and I think to myself, _I'll captain _you _if you don't shut up._

* * *

Watching those guys eat, _every time,_ has made me really hungry. Really goddamn hungry. But no, I have to be a ghost. I can't physically pick up that tasty red apple that they forgot to eat a few hours ago, and shove it down my oesophagus. I can't grab that bottle of ale and chug it down. I have to sit here and look at everything tasty and watch all of the deliciousness taunt me.

I turn away from the tasty treats and walk through the wall on my right, heading into the sleeping area. I've been wandering the ship for a few days now, my feet making the old floorboards creak, occasionally annoying, if not, _frightening, _the man who is steering the ship. I can definitely say I enjoyed that. Sora explained to him what was going on, but he brushed it off of his shoulders. What I would give to be able to grab his hat and throw it somewhere, just to give him the shits. But now, on our third day in this world, on this ship, Jack steers the boat. I'm hovering by Aerith's side, looking down on her as she sleeps.

Despite the steady snores from Sora, it's pretty peaceful in here. I could sit and watch her sleep for hours. She's half curled up, lying on one side, and her brown hair is a mess all over the place. The blanket is haphazardly thrown over her form, as though she forgot it last minute and was tossing and turning since. Shaking my head with a small smile, I reach down to pull it up to her shoulder, still looking at her sleeping face. Still watching her, I continue to grab around for the blanket, only to look at my hand and then realise I can't actually grab the thing.

I sit beside her on the ground and continue to stare at her, even as daylight streams in through the cracks in the curtain. It's only been a few days now, but I've definitely realised that I've become attached to the woman, if only a little. It's probably only because she heeded my call, though. I can't really think of any other reason. I don't have a heart, so I shouldn't 'feel attached' to her in the first place. It's all bullshit. Complete _bullshit._

She slowly opens her green eyes, and they're locked directly on my own. A bite my lip and stand hurriedly, coughing, "Sorry."

She doesn't say anything, even as she throws back the covers and stretches. I turn away from her and go through the first wall I came through, vaguely hearing Jack scream out to us from above deck 'we're here'. I then ascend the stairs, hands in my pockets, and watch as a looming darkness greets me up ahead. I look to Jack, who murmurs to himself something like 'didn't think I'd be back here again'; and I wait for the other two to come, so Sora can lead us to this giant 'treasure pile' that he described to us before.

The keyblade master is now standing beside Aerith, who is standing beside me. Jack stretches, "I'll be here when you come back, Sora."

They nod appreciatively and get off the boat. I follow, now standing on the rocks before the cave's mouth. Sora bolts, his form being swallowed by the darkness of the cave. Aerith reluctantly follows, and I follow after her, eventually swallowed by a different type of darkness that I'm accustomed to. Instead of the darkness in an 'allegiance' term, it's the absence of light.

Absence of light, huh? When did I get so crafty with my words?

I can see Aerith stumbling, "I can't see in here."

Sora hisses, "I can't either. It wasn't this hard before…"

"Looks like you guys could use a hand," I snap my fingers, watching as a large ember starts to burn. The warm colours reach up the walls of the cave, breaking up the black and casting newer shadows. I walk up towards Sora, who knows his way around here, and I say to Aerith, "Tell him to lead. I'll follow. I'll be his torch, for now."

And so she does, and Sora leads us down various pathways, until we come to a corridor that has the sunlight streaming in from above. I put out the fire, realising that for now, it's no longer needed. In the distance, I can see shiny things. They gleam in the sun's light, beckoning the three of us towards the various treasures that they're hiding.

Aerith is looking at Sora's pocket. She's smiling too and points, "The key is glowing! You were right, Sora!"

The youth jumps in joy once he sees the faint light in his pocket. Hurriedly pulling it out, he and Aerith run towards the hoard, watching as the key's light starts to shine a little more, glowing a little, then fading, then coming back and fading again, repeatedly. The closer he gets to the gold sanctuary, the brighter the key glows, indicating that he's getting closer and closer.

I set foot into the area, looking amongst the place in amazement. There's so much shit in here, it's pretty cool. I can't help but feel strange in here, though, like I'm being watched. Like we're all being watched, I guess; and as I pass another large puddle of water and glance in it, I swear for a moment I see Luxord there, standing behind me.

My paranoia proves to be too great. I spin around, half-hoping, half-not-hoping to see him there. He's not there though, thankfully, and I continue on my way, watching the brunettes run this way and that, trying to find the source of the key. Aerith's shoving coins around with her feet, creating quite a large racket. She's grimacing at whatever bones she finds, and hurriedly moves onto the next untouched pile of gold. Sora's the same on the other side of the cave, using the key we have to his advantage.

I pass another puddle and again swear I see Luxord. I don't know why I keep seeing him in here in the reflections behind my own. I guess this is where he was sent to most often, but it's none of my concern. I never liked him to begin with anyway. All I know is, it's irritating. Very irritating. I scuttle closer towards Sora, hoping to take some of that 'happy hyper' energy that he's always putting out to the world for myself, to ease my nerves a little.

I watch as the key glows brighter and brighter, until it starts to sting my eyes. Sora drops to his knees and moves aside various goblets and coins, and amidst the golden wonderland is the silver key we've been looking for. He shouts to Aerith, who immediately moves to his side and watches as he grabs it and holds both of them in the air, triumphant and happy. It's here that I do… _feel… _happy. One key away now, just one –

"I'll be taking these."

Both keys are swiped from Sora's hands. I knew someone was here, I _knew it._

The three of us spin around and set our eyes on a short and stocky person, who kinda looks like a huge – weight wise – version of Goofy. Sora narrows his eyes, and Aerith is just confused. I'm pissed off. Very pissed off, and I watch as the fifteen-year-old steps forward and points at the offender, "Give those back! They're not yours, _Pete!_"

This… 'Pete' person scoffs and puts his hands on his hips, both keys in his right hand, "And what're you gonna do about it, huh? Nothing! With these keys, and the third one when I get my hands on it, I'll be able to give them to Maleficent, and then she can get all of her fallen allies back and take over the worlds with the Heartless!"

Sora growls, "A stupid quest for man who isn't smart enough to tie his own shoes! You really think Maleficent will keep you at her side once she's got the others back?"

He says nothing and merely puffs his chest out and summons numerous Heartless, all in different shapes and sizes. He then runs out of another entry point to the hoard, and Sora runs after him. He summons the keyblade and slashes at various Heartless that are blocking his path. The Heartless are like defenders for Pete, blocking our pathway. The youth shouts, his voice echoing in the room and down the corridor, "You can't hide forever, Pete! We're gonna catch you!"

Aerith's summoned her staff and is whacking an air pirate Heartless into the wall. No expression crosses her face as she does this, and in one of her hands, I see she's still holding onto the keychain I gave Sora, as though it provided her with some form of comfort. She's following Sora, still attacking, and I'm bringing up the rear, launching various fire spells at the clambering Heartless. I may be a ghost and might not have my chakrams, but I can still help and cast spells.

We're weaving through smaller tunnels, trying to keep up with Pete, who is laughing at the misfortune he bestowed upon us. Spontaneously, I launch a small fireball at him, hoping to hit him and slow him down, but to no avail. It misses and frightens him, causing him to speed up and continue to scurry out of here. All the while, we're following, and being followed.

A rabid dog Heartless runs through me, heading for Aerith. Furrowing my eyebrows, I hurl a fireball at it, watching as it incinerates, yelping in pain. As I turn away, I see her look over her shoulder, either at me or at the Heartless behind us. She hurries on, and I can hear her huff as she stabs a coming shadow Heartless through the stomach with the end of her staff. The pink heart ascends.

…I… I want to grab it… for myself.

The heart vanishes as fast as my thought came. Still running backwards, I continue to launch numerous fireballs at the Heartless, smirking slightly as they burn before me. Suddenly thinking of a way to block them off, if only for now, I raise both hands. My fingers are curled, and I throw my arms out to the side, watching as a giant wall of fire ascends, burning any of those stupid enough to walk into it.

Satisfied with my work, I turn and sprint again, catching up with Sora and Aerith finally, both of whom are closing in on the stupid bastard who stole my fucking keys.

We're running out of the cave now, and only now did I realise that it was easier to get out of the cave because of the sunlight up ahead, as opposed to the sun being at our backs upon entry. Pete runs to the water's edge, realising that he's been cornered. The three of us stop and cautiously approach Pete, hoping to grab the keys before he drops them into the water, which is something I don't want to happen.

He suddenly snickers and snaps his fingers. A purple and black portal appears behind him, and I can see and hear snow behind him, and I can see charred buildings with unusual, slanted tops. He jumps back into the world that he has summoned, and the three of us run after him, hoping to jump through, but the portal closes before we have the chance to get through. It closes, and I can hear the last remnants of his laughter taunting us. Taunting _me_.

Aerith huffs, "What land was that, Sora?"

He smirks and runs towards the Black Pearl, ignoring Jack's various snide remarks, "The Land of the Dragons. Come on, let's go."

Aerith also moves, but I stand where I am, looking at the portal that was before us. I think hard, trying to summon one of my own, but to no avail. Helpless, I look up and sigh. It's going to take a few days to get back to the harbour, and then we've gotta take the Gummy Ship to the Land of the Dragons and then find this guy. This could take _ages. _

I look to the ocean, seeing my own reflection stare up at me again. I see Luxord standing behind me too, and this time, I still don't turn around, because I'm so sure he's not there.

"Don't play to his game. Play to yours."

I turn when I hear Luxord's voice, and I see him fading away hurriedly. He was there, all along he was there. But if was here the whole time, why could I not see him, let alone Aerith? Why was his image weaker than mine? Why could I only see it so clearly in the water, as opposed to my own? Why did he show up here instead of in the Castle That Never Was, where I'm _sure _he died? Why isn't he fighting to fix himself either?

Why does this have to be so hard?


	5. Chapter 5

Author's Note: Holy smokes, an earlier-than-usual update! XD

* * *

_**5.**_

"_Don't play to his game. Play to yours."_

And what oh _what _is that supposed to mean, Ghostly-Luxord? Wait for him to come back? I don't think so.

Why did you say something in the first place?

We're in the Gummy Ship on the way to the Land of the Dragons. Our trip back to the harbour was deathly silent, and even more so now. Sora was trying to pick up Aerith's mood, and via her my own, but it wasn't working. I'm thankful that the kid's trying though. Even now, he's sucking in his cheeks, kinda looking like a fish. He's even making fish noises.

I'm staring at the ceiling, still wondering. Maybe I'm lucky, being like this and all. I'm closer to life than I am to death. I'm being saved. Luxord was way more transparent than I was. Maybe the others, aside from Roxas and Naminé, are like this too? If so, why's Luxord more transparent than I am? I died before him for crying out loud!

What's saved me from being so… _faint, _so _thin? _If that makes sense… I can't really describe it any other way.

"What is _wrong _with you?!"

I jump from my position on the ground, and half sitting up, look to the person in the room who just snapped. Aerith's looking directly at me, her small hands balled into fists, and there's a desperate look on her face that I can't really decipher properly. It looks like a mixture of frustration and sadness, but as for the reasons behind those emotions, I don't really know why.

She breathes in heavily, "You're just lying there on the floor looking up at the ceiling with _dead eyes, _Axel! What happened back at Port Royal that you're not telling me?" She furrows her eyebrows and continues on, her voice much softer than it had been previously, "What's shaken you like this? You should be angry, you should be screaming at Pete for taking away your keys. Yell, kick something, anything; but for goodness sake, don't stare up at the ceiling like someone just stole your favourite toy and broke it!"

I'm too stunned to say anything in return. Sora's the same. She hunches over for a fleeting moment, before sitting up straight again, trying to regain her composure. Shaking her head, she stares straight ahead of herself again, at the navigation screen, like she had been before the outburst. I look to Sora, who is looking back, but only because that's where she was looking when she was yelling at me.

He coughs and slowly lowers the ship to the ground. I stand and head towards the door, looking through the window. There's bamboo everywhere, and we're in this little forest clearing in the Land of the Dragons. Can't really say I've been here often, but I certainly haven't been to _this _particular part of the world.

The Gummy Ship shakes a little, now on the ground. Sora punches in the appropriate stuff, and the door whizzes open. I jump out and spin around, watching as the other two also exit. The door then snaps shut, and Sora leads us down this pathway. He clearly knows where he's going here. I guess he liked this world a little more than the others. _Why, _I dunno, but I'm thankful he has such a vivid memory for this world. And like the rest of our journey since Port Royal, we're all deathly silent.

But I break, _"I saw Luxord. He was like me, but fainter."_

"_Luxord is an accomplice of yours?"_

"_Yeah. Number X, the Gambler of Fate. He was alive when I died, so by all means I should be fainter than him."_

She pauses for a moment, _"It must have been very haunting."_

"_Mm…" _An ironic word choice, Aerith.

"_Maybe you're not fainter because there was not as much darkness in your heart."_

I say nothing. She scurries up ahead, side by side with Sora, and starts talking to him, her voice much lower than usual. The three of us enter a large clearing, and there's a camp up ahead. It looks abandoned, and my suspicions are confirmed as we pass through it, heading down another road. This one is leading up the mountain side, and at its peak I can see snow. That must be where the village is, where Pete disappeared to.

"Cheer up, Axel," Sora suddenly says.

I look to him, one eyebrow raised. Aerith's told him what happened.

"At least you're coming back."

"But… they were my friends," I reply desolately, knowing he can't hear. Not all of them, but some were… And it's not really fair that I get to come back and they have wonder around blindly. I know I'd be jealous if that happened. Sure, two of my friends in this Organisation actually are living now, but what about the other two I really trusted and liked at some point? Saix, albeit that was before we became Nobodies; and Demyx?

Aerith starts to walk backwards. She's looking at me, holding onto the keychain, and softly presses it to her lips, as though trying to be comforting. She then places it back on her shirt and turns away, continuing to walk. I grin a little at the action and speed up, now directly behind the two of them. You're a strange woman, Miss Gainsborough. Strange, but likeable nonetheless.

The ascent proves to be chilly for the living. Sora's rubbing his arms hurriedly, and Aerith finally puts that red jacket to use, slipping over her slender shoulders. She's been carrying the damn thing for ages but hasn't used it until now. I chuckle, actually glad that I'm not flesh and blood. I can't feel the cold at all. This is pretty sweet.

We soon make it to the summit, and waiting there is the town that Pete transported to. Hopeful, we run forward, my feet gliding over the thick snow, but theirs sinking into it. Eagerly, I turn and say to them with a smile, "Come on come on, we're here at last! Let's go find Pete and get those keys back!"

I turn away and start to look through the area. I see a doll lying on the ground in the corner, and I feel bad for a moment because the kid that had that doll is probably dead. As I run around the area, looking down corridors and into what used to be houses, I keep a sharp ear out for that bumbling fool. I don't hear him, but I hear Aerith and Sora finally reach the village and huff in exhaustion.

I'm still running around, and I look down a particular corridor and freeze entirely.

"I don't believe it…" I mutter.

Number II, the Free Shooter.

He stops pretending to shoot things and looks at me, also surprised. Xigbar's crooked grin is still strong. He's fainter than I am, like Luxord was, "What're you doing here?"

"Aimlessly wandering," he replies, chuckling, "There's not much else I can do until I fade away entirely."

"But, you died in the Castle That Never Was, right? What're you doing _here?_ Why are you so faint?"

At this, he shrugs, "Just wound up here. I've been here a few times already and I kinda like this world. As for the faintness, I dunno. But I'm getting fainter by the day."

"Luxord was like you."

"And you're not like us," he snits, "I bet the other members of the Organisation are ghosts too, but fainter than you are, maybe even me. I bet most of them are already gone," he pauses, "All of this free time has given me a lot more time to think, and I've come up with a theory. The reason that I'm fading so much faster than you is because I embraced my darkness wholly. I assume Luxord was the same. You, though, we never really knew what you were up to. You were always the hardest to read, our little trump card.

"So maybe you didn't accept the darkness wholly, that's why you're so strong like this. That's why you can still manipulate things in the real world. You can still cast your fire. I ran into Larxene right after I died, she couldn't do any magic at all. We hung out for a while, and then she faded away entirely," he looks behind me and smirks as I allow the information to absorb. Aerith was right, "Not even the most talented ghost whisperer would be able to see me as I am."

I turn my head to see Aerith standing behind me, looking at me strangely. I immediately speak, "Can you see him?"

"No. But I can hear him, albeit barely. The only reason I can see you, Axel, is because I have something that you once had."

Xigbar raises a hand and looks at it. He shakes his head, thereafter refocusing his gaze on me, "I'm fading again. And I think this is the last time I'll be… like this. But you kid, you've got a while before you fade. Make the most of your time. Try and come back if you can, because you know that life is better than death. Always was, always will be, it's a fact. I saw you and Sora and this lady here on the other side of the portal that was opened a few days ago. Your fat friend ran out of the village and into that small cave over there. I dunno where he's gone from there, but I hope it helps. Get back whatever he stole, and good luck, okay? I don't deserve this second chance, but you do. You do. So grab it."

I nod and thank him, still unsure of why he's helping me. I go to turn away, but he stops me.

"If you see Demyx… tell him I said hi."

I nod again and turn, going towards the small cave he spoke about. Aerith follows after me, calling for Sora. When she tells him what Xigbar said, he's suddenly a lot more lively than usual, as though he knows the exact place of the cave. He's eventually leading, and he takes us to this cave. Already I can hear someone huffing in the darkness. I know it's him, because I can hear him mumbling something about 'plans' and something else about the keys not glowing right now. And there's something about 'I was sure the third one was here'.

If the idiot did his research properly, he would've known that the third key is in the Underworld.

Sora steps forward first. His footstep rings throughout the cave, drawing Pete's attention. He jumps and shakily speaks, "Whose there?"

"Give us back the keys!" Aerith demands.

"You again, huh? And the Keyblade Master?" he guffaws, "You're not gonna catch me!"

Angry, I gather up a large fireball and throw it at him, watching as it misses him and collides with the wall, spreading amongst the stone, licking the roof. As it does this, the three of us charge down, ready to corner him. He shouldn't have run off here, it was stupid of him. Look at the situation he's in already! Sheesh. He's running towards us, away from the flames that threaten to sting him.

He stops and then runs to another corner, and we follow after him, boxing him in. He shakes his head and laughs, quickly summoning another portal, but Sora sees his plan already and grabs his legs before he can get through. I move to help pull him back in, but I remember I can't physically grab things, and turn to Aerith, "Aerith, grab – huh?"

She's where Pete was originally, scouring the ground and picking up a small glowing item. She winks at me silently and slides it in her pocket again, before running back towards Sora, trying to help pull Pete back in, _"He dropped a key because the fire frightened him. I saw it fall from his hands and start glowing again."_

There's a mighty, strong pull, and Sora loses his footing, but not his grip. Pete's pulling Sora through the portal, and panicking, Aerith grabs Sora's ankles, trying to pull him back. She's not strong enough though and is also pulled through to the other side, where I see rocks and a fierce waterfall pouring down and well out of sight. It's a land I've never seen before.

And I'll be damned if I'm gonna get left behind.

With a deep breath in, I jump through the portal.


	6. Chapter 6

Author's Note: Short chapter guys, sorry. But at least the next one is longer :3 Again, thanks for your support. You guys are epic!

* * *

_**6.**_

When we get through, everything's different. Everything's changed.

I stand to my feet, only to realise that I'm actually on all fours. I don't see my Organisation cloak, let alone my hands and feet. I've got paws instead, and I'm confused. I look down, seeing that my body is now brown, and I can see red trailing down my chest. My head snaps up towards Pete, who is running away, the key in his mouth. He's short and still chubby, black all over, and has a brown mane.

_Mane._

He's a lion.

_I'm _a lion.

Sora's a _cub _before me_. _Aerith's a _lioness._

We're all fucking _lions!_

Aerith's as confused as I am, and the Keyblade master hurriedly snaps, "We're in the Pride Lands, Simba's world. Ignore the change, just move! He's getting away!"

And he's right. Pete's running off, and he laughs again, charging out of the oasis. From the trees, more Heartless spring out. Agitated, the two summon their weapons and begin knocking them down, the first of which is a neoshadow. They pour towards us, and they take them down with ease. It's only now that I realise I can't do anything, because I don't even know how to cast a spell in this form. I'm even finding it hard to move around. Walking on four limbs is so… _unnatural._

Sora suddenly growls, murmuring 'Scar's ghost' under his breath, and he's looking at something approaching him. I look, seeing it's a ghost of another lion. Sora slashes at it with the keyblade in his mouth, and it vanishes. Another one appears to my right, and he's looking directly at me, circling me. Growling myself, I take a swipe at it with my newfound claws, and watch as it ripples and fades.

As more of these ghosts come up, I continue to attack them, deterring them from the living. I guess that I do have some type of use right now after all.

We're soon down to the last of them. With a mighty heave, Aerith impales a living bone Heartless through its forehead, and the heart ascends and vanishes. I then hear more rumbling, shock, and then, "What the _hell _is going on here?!"

As the last of the Heartless are disposed and their weapons vanish, Sora's face brightens, "Timon! Pumbaa!"

The meerkat and the warthog run over towards him, ignoring Aerith. The short guy speaks, "Heartless? I thought you guys took care of them!"

Sora grins, "Most of them, Timon."

Timon looks to Aerith, "And who are you?"

She answers. Once they're all done with the formalities, Aerith asks, "Have you seen a black lion running through here carrying a key in his mouth? We're running after him and he got away from us when he summoned the Heartless…" she smiles sweetly. It's strange, seeing the bow around her throat. The Bond of Flame keychain is dangling from the front, like it's a tag. I can see the key pressed against her neck, held by the pink cloth.

Pumbaa answers with a hurried nod, "He took off towards the Elephant Graveyard. If you hurry, you might be able to catch him."

With a firm nod, Sora and Aerith leave, following the former's direction. I hesitate for a moment, looking at myself in the reflection of the waterfall, amazed at what I've become here. Thereafter, I follow them, "Guys, wait up!"

* * *

When we're here, Sora's looking all over the place. It's clear he wants to get out of here as quickly as possible. Aerith, though, is barely moving, just looking at the place in silent awe and what I think is uncomfortableness. She lightly walks, the pads of her paws barely touching the ground as she does. I walk alongside her, "You don't like being here, don't you?"

She shakes her head.

Despite myself, I get a little closer to her, "Well… I'm here. So try and ignore all of the bad stuff."

I don't see her small smile, because I'm too focused on the graveyard myself. The elephants' remains are indeed unnerving, and the bones themselves are huge. Aerith and I pass underneath the ribs of one, and I'm looking up, watching the sunlight shift continuously. I look back down when I hear Sora run towards us – I mean, Aerith.

"I've found him," he whispers, "He's hiding in the skull of the elephant over there," he points, and then brings his paw to his mouth, "but keep quiet, he doesn't know we're here."

Aerith nods and follows Sora. Their plan is to surprise him and trap him, standing in each eye socket so it's harder for him to escape. From what I've seen of Pete though, if there was any other means of escape, he wouldn't be able to find it, especially since he'd be panicking like mad. Can't wait to see that.

I follow at a distance, below the entire scene. The pair are climbing up the tusks silently, lowering their bodies so that they're not detected – and then they pounce up, growling at Pete, who I hear yelling out loud in surprise. He's stuttering things I can't hear, and I hear someone take a swipe at him. They both then run back down as Pete cries in pain. Sora's got the key in his mouth, and I assume that he was the one who attacked, but the glancing eyes tell me otherwise.

Surprised, I say to the flower girl, _"_You_ hit him?"_

"_Well," _she chimes, _"He shouldn't be taking other people's things!"_

Silence.

She then says to Sora, "How are we going to get back to the Gummy Ship to get to the Olympus Collesium if it's parked in the Land of the Dragons…?"

He grins.

* * *

So it turns out that those little glowing spots on the ground can transport you back to the Gummi Ship, somehow. The warp was weird, and I kinda miss being a lion already, but I'm pretty damn grateful that those things exist. Remind me to shake the hand of the guy who invented those, if I ever meet him or ever come back to life wholly.

I swear, the first thing I'm gonna do when I'm alive again is _hold. _I really miss holding things.

Sora's navigating to Olympus Coliseum whilst Aerith naps on the floor. I'm lying next to her, but I'm looking at the kid. He's got this seriously determined look on his face, and I'm grateful that he's so willing to help me. Despite myself, I sit up, cross-legged, and stand a little to Sora's left. I summon fire and start to write, and it's only when Sora feels the heat near his cheek does he notice.

'Thank you'.

He smiles, and the fire fades away, he refocuses on what's before him, "You're welcome, Axel. And just so you know, I would've done this anyway, whether or not Roxas' badgering got through…" Roxas… I smile again, and he continues on, scratching his cheek boyishly, "Just don't screw up this life like you did the last, okay?"

"There's no way that I would," I reply, knowing he can't hear me, and return to my place next to Aerith.

"I wonder," Sora begins, tapping his fingers, "I wonder what you were like in your old life and what your real name was. Roxas told me that you guys' Organisation names are your true names rearranged, and then an x is shoved in there. I can see with Roxas, but makes me wonder what your other friends' ones were, y'know?" he leans forward, "I actually sat down one day and started to write down what your name could be because I was curious. Ael, Ale… Haha ale. What else was there, uhhh… Lae, Lea, Ela and Eal. Which one was yours?"

To be honest, I don't remember. I think Saix called me Lea one time. We knew each other before we were Nobodies, even planned to take over the Organisation together when we _did _become Nobodies. But… he changed and we just parted, really. I think about him still, just wondering how he died and if he's still a ghost. He and Xemnas man, they were so evil as Nobodies. I think they'd be gone by now, for sure… Kinda hurts to think of Saix like that. I'll just pretend he's on vacation.

"Oh well, never mind. You're 'Axel' now."

Yeah…

He suddenly chuckles, "I'm just trying to imagine other people's Nobodies and their names… Riku… Kurix? Kuxri? Xriku? Wait that one's a bit lame…" he pauses and 'hmm's for a good long moment, "Xelno for Leon maybe? Uh… Yofogx for Goofy, what the hell…? Man I suck. Hmm… Thrixea?"

I don't even want to _think _about Aerith being turned into a Nobody. I hunch over and stick a finger in each ear as he drones on, not wanting to listen to it. Just… the thought of her being a Nobody is disturbing. The thought of having that kind and wonderful heart forcibly ripped out… I shudder. I'm glad that I never came across her during my heart-harvesting days.

My eyes start to droop, and I realise that I'm really getting tired. As I lie down, curl up and face the subject of my current pondering, Aerith wakes and looks at me for a moment. I mutter, "Ask Sora how far from Olympus Coliseum we are."

And so she does, and Sora answers, "A while. Might be a few days. The warp portals are gone since we defeated Xehanort's Heartless a year ago."

I close my eyes and nod and dream –

* * *

"_Wake up, Axel!"_

I groan and roll onto my stomach, arms wide out to the sides, "What?"

"_You've been asleep for two days."_

"…Huh?"

"_You're a heavy sleeper, aren't you?"_

"Apparently so…" I turn my head to the side, and Aerith's sitting there.

She's smiling at me, _"So what were you dreaming about? You were smiling."_

"I was…" I scratch my head, "I think I was dreaming about what life would be like _alive… _with better people around me," I hesitate, "like you and Sora, and the others. I don't think I was with the right crowd when I was a Nobody… aside from Roxas and Demyx and Xion, they just…" I don't know how to finish the sentence.

She's still smiling, though there's now a strong sympathetic appearance to it. She reaches out to me, and I freeze, watching as she plants her palm on what would be my face, if I was solid. I don't really know how to react, so I just lean into it slightly, and I watch her as she pulls her hand away, chilled a little, but still smiling, "You won't have to wonder much longer, Axel. I promise."

She stands, and I stand with her, looking out the window, watching the stars fly above as we fall down.

"We're here," Sora states.


	7. Chapter 7

Author's Note: I just wanted to update for the sake of updating D: XD

* * *

_**7.**_

When we landed at this world, we didn't set foot on Olympus Collesium – we set foot in the Underworld, straight off, a fact that Sora was pleased by. The 'twinkling stars' were these weird puffs of white clouds. Now that we're there… it's kinda unsettling. The whole area has this greyish, purple tone to it, and there's spikes stemming from the ground. We're passing through windy tunnels, with mist and fog crawling along the ground. With every windy movement, I hear the screams of the dead echo, and they get louder the further down the tunnels we go – presumably to the River Styx. I don't know how far we are, but I'm getting scared – something I really haven't felt for a long, long time.

Aerith seems oblivious to the voices, but she's not oblivious to my current stress, occasionally looking at me and reaching to touch my shoulder, before thinking better of it. I'm pulling at my hair and constantly turning around in circles in paranoia, as though I'm expecting to see one of these ghosts come up and pull me towards and eventually into the river. I hate the feeling, and I can't really comfort myself over it. I can only push myself deeper and deeper into the tunnels, with my two friends, and hope for the best. The energy down here is extremely draining, zapping me of my hope, let alone my confidence.

We come to the inner chamber of the Cave of the Dead, and Sora rests his hands at the back of his head and continues to walk towards the giant crack in the wall. I look at him for a moment, wondering what he's remembering, and then he suddenly chuckles and imitates a voice I remember, but thought I forgot, "'Run, run away!' Man I wish Donald or Goofy were here to remember that with me, heheheh!"

I hear a piercing scream, and jolt. Trying to push down the lump in my throat, I start to follow Sora, and Aerith's along side me, taking the same steps. It's only when I slow entirely, feeling more and more apprehensive, do I rub my hands together and hear Aerith speak slowly, out loud, "Sora, how far are we from the River Styx? Axel's really having some trouble here, I don't quite understand why because he has not spoken to me, but regardless…"

"It's the voices," I say, trying to hide the fear in my voice, "That's all."

"I… don't hear anything, Axel."

Surprised and slightly angered, I lurch forward, emerald eyes wide, "You can't hear them!? What do you mean?! You're supposed to be able to communicate with the dead! Can't you hear them screaming to be let out? For another chance at life? For freedom? For a chance to do what they didn't finish? For…" I shudder again and, stressed, pull at my hair again. The whispers tangle themselves in knots, threads of things that millions are saying to me.

_You should be here with us. You don't belong with them._

_Your soul state won't last forever. Then you truly won't belong anywhere._

_Death is peaceful. Life is meaningless._

_Axel –_

I see the green mist seeping in through the crack Sora just went through, and he speaks, "It's just here, in the Valley of the Dead. There are ghosts in the river."

Aerith nods and also goes through the passageway. I'm left standing in the room, trying to force myself to walk closer, but never actually moving. Deep breaths Axel, come on, deep breaths and little steps, and you'll get there and then you can just charge right on through. It'll be okay… right? No random soul's gonna jump out and try to pull me down into the river? I just –

Maybe this was the wrong thing to do. Maybe I should just accept my fate and give up.

Aerith turns and smiles at me, and its probably the most brilliant smile she's given, or at least that I've seen. Her eyes, like mine, shine and are given numerous other shades of green because of the glow of the river. Finding a little solace in that, I shut my eyes and stand up a little straighter, taking those small steps, only to be reduced to curling up again by the time I get through the archway.

Their voices are so overbearing now that I can't even hear the flower girl's attempt to comfort me, nor Sora's disbelief, as though he can actually see me in this very room, just like at Yen Sid's tower. I think it's because this room is the portal to death, so it'd be natural to see me here.

_Join your friends._

I stuff my hands up to my ears and push hard, shaking my head constantly, eyes squeezed impossibly shut. I don't want to hear this. I don't want to join _them, _because a few of them in their Nobody states were my friends! I don't belong there, I don't belong there, I don't belong there, I do _not _belong there, and I never did, I don't just yet, because I belong _here_ –

And the world starts to spin, though my eyes are closed. The voices are louder.

I don't belong there. I belong here. I want that second chance, and I'm going to work for it.

Unknown to me until I actually open my eyes, I've dropped to my knees in the time that I was trying to get myself together. I slowly take my hands away from my ears, but I can still hear them, but the volume of the voices is somewhat lower than when I was standing. Deciding to take advantage of this to help myself, I start to crawl up the rocky, thin ascend, on my hands and knees. I still feel incredibly weighed down. It's at this point that I really would've liked to tap into the darkness again and teleport to the other side, but I'm not like that anymore.

I don't belong there. I belong here. I don't belong there. I belong here. I don't belong there. I belong here.

I want to live, and I'm gonna live. I'm gonna make my own decisions.

And then the voices, the higher I get, start to fade more so, and I can hear my friends encouraging me to keep going.

"Come on, Axel! You don't need to listen to them!" Sora shouts. He's in front of me and walking backwards, like a guardian and a guide. And the whole way through, he's smiling. I can almost hear a tinge of Roxas' voice there as well, and it helps me more so, because it's important to me to hear my best friend, "You're stronger than they are, so let's go!"

Aerith's behind me, holding onto the keychain, _Keep at it, and don't let up._

I don't know how long I crawled, but the voices, though not as loud, have terrified me so much that when I get all the way to the other side, I shoot straight up and run through the stone archway, a mess and shaking. Despite this, though, a bit of my pride swells, because I got through it okay. I didn't just give up and throw myself in, or go on some type of tirade, none of that. I just shut up, put up and pushed through.

When I look up from the floor, I see a man cloaked in black, Greek clothes. His skin is grey, and his hair is blue, and literally _flaming. _He's sitting in a stone chair, asleep, and in his lap is the final key. It's already glowing. I quickly turn to Aerith and tell her to be quiet, and to pass that message on to Sora, thereafter adding, "Some guy with flaming hair is in here, and in his lap is the key. Is this that Hades guy?" After a brief nod, I step aside, "Well, you know what to do then."

Aerith tip-toes towards him and reaches across, trying to grab the item from his lap. She reaches it, but accidentally pushes it off, touching him in the process. This coupled with the clinging noise awakens the sleeping God, and once he passes through the initial sleepy moments, is enraged to see the Keyblade's Chosen One, as well as the missing key. The three of us run off, and he tries to follow, his hair now flaming red like mine, and his skin not far behind. Fire crackles from his shoulders.

"Get back here!" Hades hisses, forming fire in his hands. We pass through the gates again, "How dare you –"

The voices are back and I stumble, still trying to stand and holding my ears –

Hades stops and looks down on me, surprised, "What the…? Hmm, another one of you lost ghosts, huh? Well…"

I look to him just as the other two do. Fear swarms through my body again, but it's not because of the forgotten, fallen melodies below me, but because Hades has actually made _physical contact_ with me. One of his large, flaming hands makes contact with my chest, and I'm shoved backwards, off of the rocky platform. It seems the world's made my decision for me, again.

The flames don't hurt me, because I can't be given pain and because fire's my element, but the rushing wind adds further trepidation, because I don't know what it'll be like to hit the bottom, nor the type of people that are there. The closer I get, the louder their voices are, and the dizzier I become. I'm seeing double of everything. I can't even coordinate myself to turn around and grab onto something – _anything._

Aerith's scream still pierces me the strongest, amongst the voices that aren't very far now. Her words cut through the voices, "Don't give up here!"

Somehow finding the strength in myself to summon fire, I turn around in the air and gather a great, big amount, and then shoot into the River Styx. The force catapults me backwards, and eventually, I stop the control of the fire and turn to see part of the pathway coming up. I reach out and go to grab it, only to have half of my body slam into it. I scramble to hold on, and I slowly pull myself back up, hearing Sora fighting with Hades and Aerith attempting to provide magical support.

Gasping for air, I turn to watch the battle at the wrong moment. Both Sora and Aerith have been battered away easily, and are on the ground. Hades makes a run to me, fire not in his hands, but he's ready to shove me off again and put me… back where I 'belong'. There's a cruel smirk on his pointy face, he's pleased with what he is about to do.

And then there's familiar music – or a loudly hummed tune, rather, and a giant gush of water. It jets all over and past Hades in a vertical row, putting out his hair and taking away everything fiery about him. I look behind me from where the strike came from, and my eyes widen in disbelief. I can barely form a thought together, because the shock is so strong – and he's having trouble with the voices too.

He dances a little, moving his arms in familiar motions, as though he would've been guiding something bigger – and then water figures pop up from the ground and encircle Hades, preventing him from moving closer towards me. Using this to my advantage, I stumble to my feet and take several steps backwards, trying to get all the way to the other side. The God's cursing, infuriated and confused, and both Sora and Aerith run past him to join my side. The former of the pair is just as shocked as I am.

He turns his head and smiles, his blond hair moving as he does, "Hey! You guys are lookin' lively!"

"Wh…" I can't even finish the word.

He focuses back on Hades and sends the water figures away with a wave of his hand. They dissipate into the air, like steam. He approaches him, angry, and says, "That wasn't very nice, you know. What you did there was just plain rude!"

Hades moves to push him in as well, but he dodges with ease, and to my horror, shoulder shoves him into the River Styx. He's screaming on the way down, he even shoots a fireball at him, but it dies underneath the small stream of steady water from the palm of his hand. After hearing the splash, he turns to us, and I can't form any word, sentence, question, phrase –

He shoves his hands to his ears as well and appears weakened once the main distraction is gone, "Hey, can we get out of here please?"

Aerith nods and smiles at him. I imitate his actions as she speaks, "You're from the Organisation… What's your number? Your name?"

He grins, "Number IX, Demyx."

The four of us exit.

* * *

The fire crackles in the middle of the large, circular room. The voices are faint now, and Demyx and I sit on a large rock, side by side, and watch the two humans sleep by the heat. It's been a long time since we sat together like this. I'm… _feeling _many things. I'm confused by the events, I'm still unstable and shaky from the voices, I'm worried for the pair across from me… but most of all, I'm angry. I'm angry that I feel all of this, I'm angry that I've been reduced to such a state that I can barely fend for myself, and I'm angry that Demyx has influence beyond magic in the world of the living.

I want to know why and how.

He's humming something to himself, like he always does, and leans back, swinging his legs back and forth in a childlike manner. Despite all of the anger I'm feeling though, inside I'm pleased that he helped out, and that he's here. Back in the Organisation, although he was super lazy, we were still pretty good friends, so it pleases me inside to see that he's okay. He's not fading either, he's not was weak as Luxord or Xigbar were – his spirit, his form is maintaining the same strength as I am. He embraced the darkness as much as I did, and it wasn't a lot. He embraced it _less, _because he died so much earlier than I did… So the fact that he's still so strong and unwavering shows exactly how much black tainted his being.

"So…" he goes, "tell me about what's happened since I passed on."

And I tell him everything, because it spills from me uncontrollably. I tell him about how the Heartless' numbers still remain but are dwindling, I tell him about the others and how they died, I tell him that Xemnas himself was brought down with ease, I tell him how I died… I tell him everything that happened right up to this point, including Xigbar saying 'hi'; and when I stop to breathe and look to Sora and Aerith, they've both subconsciously shifted closer to the fire I created for them.

And he clicks his tongue and says, "Pretty grim…" He looks at me with a happy smile, "but there's still hope. And I for one would think it's awesome if you finished your quest and kept on going, you know? You can go about living life the right way this time, instead of screwing it up. I will say though, I think it'd be hilarious if you ended up as a Nobody again…" he leans back and lets out a full laugh, "Imagine your new name then, man! Like…" he thinks, "Axlex or something."

I chuckle and shake my head, "You're bizarre."

"Ha, that's what Sora said when he first met me," he states for no reason, "I guess this place brings out the strangest in me. Or at least, without my sitar, the strangest is unleashed."

"Why did you come here?" I ask, "You died in Radiant Garden. Wouldn't you have come back there?"

"I should've," he says, "but didn't. I guess I came back here because fate got lazy in dragging me towards the River Styx. I guess fate figured 'hey, let's just leave him here and let him crawl back!'. Or the spiritual pull wasn't strong enough to get me all the way there. Really, I don't know… But those voices have driven me up the wall some days," he turns to me and smiles a little, trying to be optimistic, "At least you got to see other worlds. I've been in the same world since the start, and the only joy I've found is in scaring that little goat man by pulling his tail."

He's started the topic that I want to get to. I immediately jump at it, "How can you physically manipulate things in the real world? All I can do is magic… Even then it's really weak compared to what it used to be when I was at least _alive…_" I point at him, and then lower my hand, "but your water magic is really strong, you can still create the beings, you can _touch living things. _You _pushed_ _Hades _into the River Styx. How can you do that?"

"The problem is you still think you're alive!" Demyx chimes. He jumps off the rock and turns to face me, moving his hands as he talks, "You still think…" he leans forward, "that all you have to do…" he reaches out a hand, aiming it at my forehead, "is reach out and…" he pokes me then leans back, "touch… But that's not the case anymore. You can't just waltz up to somebody and touch them like we used to, no no. You can't just think of the spell either.

"You've gotta _feel _it, you know? You've gotta get all of the emotions we're somehow feeling, bad and good, and concentrate it on the part of your body that's gonna reach out from this 'between' land and touch someone on the other side," he grins, "So with me, I put all of my boredom and sadness and confusion into the tips of my fingers and pull the tip of the goat guy's tail. For what I did earlier, I focused all of my anger and frustration, and even my happiness of seeing you, put it all into my shoulder, then _wham!_" He imitates the shoulder shove he did previously, "Off Hades went, into the River Styx. He could touch you because he's a God, so, yeah."

"Why do we… have to work so hard to even make an influence?" I'm looking past him, just staring into the fire, "Why are we even like this in the first place? In between worlds, without the ability to easily influence either? Just… abandoned… left here to wander."

"Because," Demyx says with a frown, "we didn't accept death, and we weren't good enough for life. And so, we have to envy them both."

Envy. I think I've done enough of that already. All of us have.

I stand and walk towards Aerith, deciding to give it a try. I focus on all of the emotions that I feel, identifying them by name and then channelling them into my left hand. I feel anger for the reasons I previously mentioned, I feel joy that Demyx is as strong as I am, I still feel afraid of the voices, and I feel care for the two people here who decided to help me, mainly the one who got it to happen. And it's only now that I realise her face isn't at peace, because her eyebrows are furrowed together. She's clearly asleep though. She can't hear us talking – or at least I don't think she can. She's also holding onto the keychain tightly.

I squat behind her and reach my hand out to touch her face.

It's warm. It doesn't go through. My hand is even glowing a little – it must be my emotions.

Breathing out harshly, I stroke her cheek a few times and watch the worry lines fade away. There's even a hint of a smile on her lips. Satisfied, I pull my hand away immediately and quickly look to Demyx, who is silent – but his grin says everything, he's pleased that I've managed to do it. He characteristically sticks both of his thumbs up in approval and says, "There ya go!"

I smile too and look back to Aerith, "Thanks, Dem."

"Any time. Now if you'll excuse me," he hops onto the rock we were sitting on merely moments ago, crosses his legs, puts his arms behind his head, lies down and shuts his eyes, "_I'm _going to get some sleep! G'night, Axel. I'll see you in the morning."

I look at him for a few moments before lying down myself, still behind Aerith, and bring my hands close to my chest. Sleep takes me.

* * *

When I wake up, Aerith isn't lying in front of me. There's another hand there, one clad in a fingerless glove, grabbing my keychain that's been left on the ground. I start to sit up, hearing Sora cry out for her, still holding the keychain, looking around the area. His cries also awaken Demyx, who groans in frustration and sits up immediately, looking around.

I don't see her in the immediate area, and, motivated by that, I rocket to my feet and start to call out for her, looking in every area I can. I can't brave the Valley of the Dead though, and Sora runs through instead of me to have a look around. Demyx joins my side, shifting from foot to foot uncomfortably and unsurely. When the brown-haired youth returns, he shouts out into the area, speaking to both of us, "She's not here! Where could she have gone?"

Demyx pauses and points to the keychain in Sora's hand, "If I'm not mistaken, she doesn't go anywhere without that, right? Because that's really the only means of keeping track of you, Axel," he turns his head and looks at me, "So that means she's been taken somewhere by force. If she left willingly, she would've taken that with her."

"You were always better at recon than I was," I say.

"And you were always better at fighting than I was," he answers back.

"Enough with the childish –"

"Shh," he hisses, putting a finger to his lips. He's listening for something.

I follow suit whilst Sora fretfully spins the keychain around in his hands. I can't hear Aerith, but I do hear footsteps leaving the vicinity, along with a 'this should teach those bumbling fools' – and it's got this stupid, annoying, goofy tone to it –

"Pete," I hiss, and quickly write the word in fire-writing so Sora can understand.

The three of us break into a run, following the sound of Pete's voice until we come to those creepy tunnels again. Aerith's still asleep, or she's been drugged. He's carrying her over his shoulder, and when he hears the pitter-patter of Sora's footsteps, he panics and immediately opens up a portal. On the other side is a ballroom, and he hisses at us – or rather at the one person he can see, "If you want to see her alive again, you'd better bring me those keys so Maleficent can use them to bring back her other comrades!"

It shuts before any of us can get through. It doesn't deter Sora, though, because he immediately runs for the Gummy Ship, with me following. I don't hear a third set of footsteps, though, and I turn around to see Demyx standing there with a small smile on his face. I say, "Are you coming or what?"

He shakes his head, "No. You guys go on."

"But I thought you wanted to see other worlds."

He shrugs, "Hey, I'll work something out on my own. You guys go on, it's your… story. I'm not part of it anymore. Good luck."

I smile a little and follow Sora, "Thanks Demyx."

His form shrinks away the further I run.


	8. Chapter 8

Author's Note: So, a couple of months, and no updates… About that… Yeah, University's been eating me alive. I'm apparently verrry tasty to Uni. But anyway, I'm actually on my midyear break now (for about five weeks…!) and I intend to write as much as possible. For those of you who know me and how I write it all out before posting, then… Yeah, I plan to finish this one first, because there's only three chapters left after this one :3 Sorry about this one being (or seeming) so short D:

For those who have R&R'd, thank you so much, I really do appreciate it. Your support is inspiring and pushes me forward through those evil, nasty 4.30am wakeups. You're all _awesome.

* * *

_

_**8.**_

Apparently, the portal Pete went through was the Beast's Castle. Sora recognised it immediately, remembering that 'only one world has a ballroom that size – or well, at all, really…'; and so we set off for that world in the Gummy Ship. I would've grabbed Aerith's controls and helped the kid pilot it, but, well, other things are on my mind right now, and I can't grab because I'm dead.

The ship lands with a heavy thud, and it shakes until its stable. The doors open with a hiss, and we both bolt out and find ourselves in a large, dark courtyard – or is it a grave site? It's too dark for me to tell – and I'm now following Sora, who is running towards these two large double doors, summoning his keyblade already. He pushes one open and passes through, and I just walk through the doors, standing and looking around the place, confused and desperate and I'm screaming her name, hoping she'd hear me.

Sora ascends the stairs with me behind him, and comes to a three way part. Looking around, I speak, as though he could hear me, "So which way now? Left? Straight? Right? Which one's the ballroom, kid? You've been here before! Well… So have I but, you were here recently and would remember!"

He raises a hand in triumph, remembering where to go, and swinging his keyblade over his shoulder in his battle stance, he throws open the double doors before him and bolts in. The room held behind these doors is the ballroom, and feeling a rush of adrenaline, I go through the wall and bound into the centre of the room, spinning around in circles, trying to find her, trying to see her, just trying and I'm failing so fast and its upsetting me.

"Aerith!" I don't see her here at all.

Sora breathes in and then exclaims, "Aeeeriiiith! Can you hear me?"

No response. No sound. No footstep. No scuffle. No breathing. No nothing.

Exhaling, I run to my immediate right and go through the wall, and then through another and through another, until I wind up in some type of corridor. There's a – walking clock, what? – yeah, a moving item pacing back and forth, pondering things, and red carpet bleeding down the cobblestone floors. It also slithers up the stairs, and I follow it, coming to what looks like yet another room. I walk through there too.

On this side, there's a bed, but it is empty. The sheets are tattered and torn – everything in the room is dusty and damaged, except for a single glass case with a glowing rose inside. It's very captivating, and it reminds me of someone – but there is somebody else standing beside it, looking at it and wondering how such a frail thing could survive the destruction that fell upon this room.

It's Xaldin. He's paper thin and transparent.

He looks at me slowly, his hand going back into his pocket, and he can see that I'm desperate, "Xaldin, please, did you see some retarded dog guy come into this world with an unconscious girl? She's petite, got long brown hair that's in a pink bow, she's wearing a dress –"

"I saw her," he replies.

"Great! Where? She could be in danger…"

"And since when did you care so much?" he growls, raising his eyebrows with surprise. He doesn't mean to come across as so rude and gruff, it's just the way he is. When I give no reply because I'm clearly on edge, he points to behind me and remarks, "She's on the other side of the wing, where Belle sleeps. A room fit for a princess, no?"

The implication doesn't go by me, and with a quick 'thank you', I run out. Xaldin does not stop me. We were never close in the Organisation, so I don't expect him to and don't really want him to, either. Number III was just… _there. _He was a great warrior, fearsome and with high prowess, but I didn't really think too much of him or interact with him otherwise. There was no need, back then.

I pass through many walls and doors and rooms, and as I go, I manage to run through Sora. He feels it, and it really spooks him – but he follows the feeling that I left him, the direction, and he follows me up these stairs and down this corridor and into this room on the East Wing of the Beast's Castle. Like Xaldin promised me, she's there, half asleep on the bed, and Pete is standing at the end of it, glaring at the one person he can see, not knowing of me.

"I knew you'd follow me!" he hisses, jutting out his chest with pride. An entourage of Heartless suddenly grow out of the ground – they're Neoshadows – and they're hovering over Aerith, who, in her daze, is terrified and unsure of what to do. They're a threat to her, Pete's using them to make Sora give the keys to him, and then like every predictable novel, 'no harm' would come to her. Surely Sora's not so daft to fall for such an idiotic trick.

"Let her go!" Sora spits, tightening his grip on his keyblade ever so slightly.

Pete chuckles, his belly rumbling, "Not unless you give me the keys! Then I'll let her go, and she'll be alright in your capable hands, Keyblade Master."

He's actually digging his hand into one of his pockets, trying to fish out the keys, unsure of himself and his own abilities. For a moment, I feel what I think or remember to be pity – the kid's got talent, and he doubts himself. That's not right. His body language shows pride and certainty, but his sea blue eyes tell an entirely different story – they're the window into his soul, into his current trepidation.

And then I hear her speak. It's weak and faint, but she manages to squeak it out, "Don't do it, Sora…"

Her voice shatters Sora's weakness, and he takes a swipe at Pete with the keyblade, causing him to bound back in surprise and in anger. With an agitated and dark smirk, he waves one of his hands backwards, causing the Neoshadows to move and slowly descend onto Aerith. Sora's too preoccupied with attacking Pete over and over, and Pete's barely defending himself. It's Sora's frustration that's caused him to be blind to Aerith's current state, to Aerith's screaming, to Aerith's cries for help.

He might be blind, but I am not.

My rage swarms through my body and takes over me, paralysing all rational thinking; and as Demyx explained to me in the Underworld, I channel that rage into the palm of my hand. My hand is now alight, and I swipe it across the Neoshadows as though my hand were claws. They scream, their bodies begin to burn, and they start to run amuck, catching the attention of the other two engaged in battle.

One face is horrified. The other is relieved.

I leap over the bed and take more swipes at the Neoshadows furthest from me. They try to fight back, but they cannot see me – they can only see the fire that is my hand. They're confused and terrified – and they soon vanish back into the floor, still screaming in pain. They then vanish further, and I can't see where they've gone. Aerith looks relieved as she looks at me with a large, thankful smile.

My attack's distracted Pete, who is knocked into the wall by Sora. Fire is still in my hand as I approach him, holding it close to his face in a taunting and threatening manner. Sora fishes around the petrified Pete's pockets, until he finds the key and rips it out. He looks to where he assumes I am, and then over his shoulder at Aerith, who is managing to stand up – the affect of the drugs must be wearing off – and he proclaims, "Alright everyone, let's get –"

There's a huge roar. Its ear splitting, and everybody's quaking in their boots – even me.

If this castle was pretty much empty… then I think it's safe to say that the Beast is now in.

"Get out!" I shout, running through the nearest wall. Sora and Aerith also run out of the main door, and Pete, who is just getting back on his feet, starts shouting at us to get back and to give him the keys, 'or else!' – such an empty, vague threat…

I stand in the middle of the corridor, watching the Beast ascend those stairs and head straight for Belle's room – he knows someone, or something, be it Pete or the traces of the Neoshadows, is in there. Sora and Aerith are hiding underneath the benches in the foyer, and there's a sudden, vicious growl – the Beast has found Pete, and he is _not _happy.

Sora slides out from underneath the bench. Although he knows the Beast and considers him a friend, he clearly doesn't want to get in his way when he is this enraged – and rightly so. Aerith also stands to her feet and begins to follow the youngster out of the castle, going down the stairs and out through the double doors, and across the courtyard and into the Gummi Ship awaiting. We don't know what's happened to Pete, but –

The doors hiss as they open again, and we enter. They then slam shut, securing us within, and for the first time in a long time, I slump against the wall and clutch at my chest, an unfamiliar sense of relief and joy eating me alive. I look to Aerith, who is slumped against her chair as the Gummi Ship ascends. She's also holding onto her chest, but she's staring directly at me.

We're airborne, and Sora programs the Gummi Ship to drive directly back to the Underworld. Before it goes through the portals, he fishes around in his pocket and pulls out the Bond of Flame keychain, and tosses it to Aerith without looking. She grips it tightly, and her eyes widen a little, as does her lips, forming a full smile, "_I can see you clearer now. I could see you before, but you were a bunch of colours. Now you have clarity._"

"Awesome," I offer, not really knowing what else to say. I might not know what to say, but I know that I can't stop staring.

She tilts her head a little, _"Thank you so much, Axel… I…_"

"Don't," I beg, "Please don't. It was nothing. You're already doing so much for me, so… I should be thanking you."

She stands and wobbles over to me. Sora warns that he's nearly at the portal, and requests that she sits. She ignores him and is now standing right in front of me. At such a close range, she's actually a fair bit shorter than me, but she's a hell of a lot prettier up close. I'm frozen, unsure of what to do, still slumped against the wall – but as she reaches up a hand and goes to touch where my cheek would be, I manage to smile and roughly place my gloved hand over hers.

"_When you are living again… You'll be able to feel this."_

"When I am living again, I'm going to hold you."

Her cheeks look cuter when they're tinged with pink.


	9. Chapter 9

Author's Note: Oh noes, back at Uni D: Good news is I've finished writing this now so, updating it will be loads easier. Also, I've got another KH multichap in the works – I _really _shouldn't have started it now, but, I just couldn't hold it in anymore. Expect it up once this is done. Speaking of… Two more chapters after this! And again, thanks guys. I really appreciate your support.

* * *

_**9.**_

Three keys.

_Three _keys.

Honestly, I had my doubts that we could even get one, but to see all three in Sora's hands, shining in the eerie light of the Underworld… It makes my head spin. We travelled around a fair few worlds just to get the keys, let alone chase Pete whenever he'd steal them. Surely he won't come back again. Not now. The Beast's taken care of him, hopefully.

I'm so close to being alive again, or dead entirely. So damn close. If I had a heart, it'd be pounding in my chest.

Sora tucks all three back into his pocket and breathes out, looking to Aerith, "Okay, so hopefully you remember that room where Axel got really freaked out by the voices…" I glare at him, though he can't see it, "We have to go back to that room, and instead of going straight across, there should be like a smaller pathway to our left that heads down to the River Styx. When we get down there, there'll be that gate that Yen Sid was talking about, and then we just use all three keys to open it and voila, we're at the mouth of the river."

I pale at the thought of having to back into that room and hearing those voices, but if it'll help me get into one world or the other, then I'm more than willing to put up with this. I don't want to be like this anymore, it sucks. It just plain sucks. I don't know how Demyx was able to last this long and be quite happy this way, either. It's just mind-boggling.

Speaking of Demyx, where the hell is he? We're back on his world, and he's not here. We've made enough racket just by landing so that he could lazily waltz up and go 'hey, you guys!', but, he's not here. It's just… weird. I guess maybe he doesn't want to help us, or he's sleeping right now. In either situation, I'm not bothered, but it's just unusual.

And so we travel down the tunnels again, and like last time, I'm terrified and uncertain. My hands are covering my ears, I'm feeling more and more drained with each passing step, I swear I can feel hands claw at me and try and drag me through the walls, and so on. Their voices are miserable, and they're making me feel miserable also. I just wish Aerith could actually hear what they were saying. She couldn't hear them last time, and judging by her current demeanour, she still can't hear them.

She's looking at me, because she knows something's still wrong. I look back and exhale shakily, running to catch up with Sora. Maybe the faster I go, the less I'll hear and the less I'll feel. If I just keep going, then they can shut up and I won't hear anything, and it'd be alright. And then when I get down there, maybe I would've gotten used to the voices and they won't affect me as much as they do right now.

My theory doesn't work, but it's getting me there quicker, so I guess it pays out.

_You came back to rest, didn't you? Come rest with us._

No no no no. I want to live.

I can hear the smirk in one of the voices, _Do you, now?_

At this, I stop.

It's something that… I haven't really wanted to confront. You know, whether I wanna go through with this whole 'living' thing again, or just end it now and die peacefully with a lot of other souls around me, being sucked into this river. I've thought this over from day one, and I'm not any closer to an answer. It's so frustrating, trying to sort this out.

The thing is, I want both. I want to live and feel the ground beneath my feet. I want to live and run through the streets, laughing, _feeling _like I haven't for the last few years. I want to live and just have _a normal life _again. I really miss my Frisbees and all, you know? Just… I want to experience what life could be like now as opposed to when I was younger, and I want to experience it for _what it is – _life. Just life.

But you can't always get what you want, yeah? So I want those things in life, but I also want the peace that death provides. Just that state of nothingness where you can't think or talk – kinda like I was at the beginning of this journey, but absolutely permanent. I've gone through so much already… I'm so tired of this. So so tired. I don't even know if this is worth it.

I'm moving again, and the voices don't seem so bad now, because my mind's distracted. I'm following Sora and Aerith, and they've reached the room where the River Styx is. I pull at my hair a little because it's stronger, and I hope that nobody notices – but I forgot that I'm visible to them here. Both of them are looking at me, and I can barely see them from the corner of my eyes because I'm staring straight ahead of myself, still in deep thought.

Soon, they're both gone. I look to my left to see them going down a small, cave-like ledge, and not wanting to get left behind, I tentatively follow them. The voices that I can hear echo through the area, bouncing back and forth between the walls, reverberating. There's something deep in the pit of my stomach that's screaming 'hey you guys, this is a really bad idea', but I don't really know what it is, until I see Hades, who is supposed to be dead, standing there before the gates, a hand on his hip, and his hair is flaming red instead of blue. He is pissed.

"Well well well, look what the cat dragged in," he murmurs, looking amongst us all.

Sora looks around for the source of the voice. He doesn't know where he is, "Hades?"

"Correct! And I'm right in front of you, kiddo. Can't you see me?"

"No… Aerith, can you see him?"

She's also looking around, "No, I cannot."

If Sora and Aerith can't see him, but I can… Then he's dead. So this is his ghost.

He walks forward and starts parading around me, "So, it looks like, then, that it's just you and me."

I do not move, but I do speak, "How come you're hiding yourself from them? They can't hurt you now. Only I can."

"Because it's fun," he chimes, whirling around in a small circle and heading towards Sora. He shoves his hand in one of his pockets and pulls out all three keys. I grit my teeth as the other two gasp, presumably just seeing the three keys float around the area of their own free will, "Surely you must know how enjoyable it is to freak out those who cannot see you!" His expression darkens for a moment, "You're a ghost, Number VIII. It's about time you start acting like one."

"How did you survive the fall into the River Styx?" I ask.

He's walking around me again, juggling the keys in one hand, "The hard way. I climbed out. I grabbed each soul in my way and pulled him or her further down so I could get out. The attack killed my body, it made it wither and die, but the flesh is always weaker than the spirit… and this is what I am now. The mind, the soul, the spirit, the ghost… Just like you.

"I can't believe I let a bunch of _imbeciles _find my keys!" he hisses, observing them underneath the eerie lights. He sighs, "They're such wonderful keys, aren't they? A gorgeous, dark silver colour, with a flaming skull, right here," he taps at the end of it, "Can you see it? Remind you of my head at all?" he chuckles at his own joke before continuing to pace around me, "A shame that I'll have to destroy them to prevent anybody from entering here."

His hand heats up. He's going to melt them.

"No!" Sora growls, watching smoke rise.

"You can't!" Aerith cries.

I don't know where I got this sudden anger from, but I use it and tackle Hades to the ground.

The impact has him relinquish the keys. They scuttle across the ground, and one somehow lands on the other side of the gate. He places his non-hand on my face, trying to shove me off, growling and kicking, "Get off of me!"

I imitate him, placing one of my own hands on his face, forcing it to move sideways. I summon all the fire I can into my hand, and I can feel his skin melting below my hand. He's screaming, there's burning, he's hurting and he is absolutely furious. And for once, I don't really care what's happening – he is _not _going to take away my only chance at being alive or dead!

He goes to copy my antics, but I grab both of his hands and hold them away, having to let go of his face to do so. He summons great strength and throws me off, but I land on my feet halfway down the corridor. I look to behind him, seeing Sora's picked up two of the keys on this side, and he's trying to help Aerith get the third one. She's on her knees, watching me, reaching her hand out and feeling around for the third key that's so close and so nearby to her hand, but not quite there. Hades, so far, hasn't noticed.

He launches a wall of fire, and I jump to my right before it can cleave me in two. It vanishes, and before long he does it again, only to the other side. I avoid it by the same means before throwing two flaming discs at him. They're not my chakrams, but dammit, that's how I used to fight. One misses and hits the gate instead, but the other hits him at the bottom of his clothes. He'd literally spun out of the way to avoid the first one, and he's so far oblivious to the second one that's made his clothes catch fire behind him. Hades is clearly focused on getting rid of me.

Our battle rages on. Fire blooms everywhere, on the cave's ceiling, on the ground, through the bars, and so on and so forth. We lock hands, both of our hands completely engulfed in flames, but it's me that has to back down when he head butts me in the face. I stumble back and cop a punch to the stomach, before I'm picked up and thrown to the side, falling in a heap. I stand shakily and throw another flaming disc at him, but he avoids it and continues to approach me.

He suddenly shouts in pain and turns to look behind him.

It's Sora.

"You're not gonna get what you want, Hades!" he hisses, pulling his keyblade out from his thigh.

Hades narrows his eyes and takes a swing at him, only to be avoided. He clearly doesn't understand why the strike hurt him or how he can be seen, but Sora's worked out roughly where he is due to the fact that the bottom of his robe is still on fire. It serves as a rough guide, as do his flaming hands – he might not be seen wholly, but the Chosen One can see well enough to fight back and help me out.

Because of their current position, the God now sees Aerith, who had managed to attain the third key, and has put in each of the keys into the holes. She's beginning to turn them, ready to open the door. Growling, he moves past Sora and goes to attack her, because he just doesn't want any of us to get to the other side. He readies a flaming hand, going to go and back hand her across the head.

She turns the final key and throws the door wide open. Just as she does that, I manage to grab Hades by the back of his head and bend his neck as far back as I can, causing him to growl in pain and to miss Aerith entirely. The sounds have her turn and realise that she could've been hurt, and, shocked and exhaling, she scurries into the next room, Sora following her, but facing us, his keyblade at the ready.

With a mighty heave, I throw Hades into the room and follow them.

It's both the wrong and right thing to do.


	10. Chapter 10

Author's Note: _-won a shiny fanfic competition, wtf-_ …ONE MORE CHAPTER AFTER THIS, YOU GUYS.

* * *

_**10.**_

I'm on my knees, screaming at the strength of the voices.

Hades is standing over me and laughing. He grabs me by my hair and forces me to look up at him. He grins, his pointy teeth shining in the green lights, "Did you really think that you'd be able to handle these voices? Did you really think you'd be able to get through and be alright? You're an idiot, Number VIII. A real hopeless idiot. Because, you know something? You dream too much. You dream of _your _happy ending far too much," He points to the River Styx behind him, "_This _is your reality, kid! _This _is where you'll end up, whether you succeed in coming back to life or not! And deep down, _you know _this. That's why you're so hesitant, hmm?"

Gritting my teeth, I take another swipe at him. He moves his body away, but keeps his grip on my hair, but he finally feels the fire at the back of his robe; and, angry, he turns and tries to stamp it out. I pull myself from his hand and punch him across the face, before I bring his head down onto my knee, slamming it with force. The impact leaves him dizzy, and I then grab him and throw him into the wall opposite. The cliff's side cracks underneath the force, and little pebbles begin to rain down. Up above somewhere, I hear a dog growl.

Before I can hit him again, Hades stands and dodges a kick I had ready for him. He avoids more kicks and punches, gradually pushing me towards the river's edge, hoping to push or throw me in. He grabs me by my side and goes to try and throw me into the River Styx, but I dig my feet in and, using his own force against him, spin around so that he falls into the river instead of me.

His soul falls in with a splash, and he yells out in fear as the green, gooey water clings to him. I quickly skitter a little further away from the edge, block my ears again, hearing other, more wolfish howls and screams as they rise from out of the river and grab Hades, dragging him under. I can see his hand reach for help, for salvation, and nobody takes it until he's eventually pulled all the way under. The wailing mantras of 'you did this to us, you locked us down here' slowly fade, but they are still there, in the background, along with the screaming God.

Exhaling and now with unblocked ears, I turn away from the river and look to the two of them, seeing Aerith hold the keychain and an empty bottle, ready to collect water from the river. Something's troubling her, though. I can see it on her face, even though I try to smile a little to get her to smile back at me. Sora looks between us both, and he then looks down – he's feeling the same as Aerith is. He clears his throat and speaks, "Axel… What did Hades mean by 'you're so hesitant'? You don't want to come back with us?"

…The kid's voice is so weak and sad that it makes me flinch.

"Because, if you don't, then that's okay too," he insists, looking up with a small smile, "We just want you to do what's best for you. If you wanna jump into the river and die and be peaceful the rest of eternity, then go ahead."

I answer, "It's not that, it's…"

Aerith's staring at me. She wants to speak but she doesn't know what to say.

"The thing is… I don't even know if I want to live anymore," I breathe out, placing a hand over my face, "It's just, what was this all for anyway? I'm going to die in the future, this was just a whole big waste of time. Someone else should have a fair shot at life, not me. I mean, what have I done lately that's been of any good to even 'justify' me having a chance? Absolutely nothing. But… When I think about being dead, it scares me. I wanna live too. I want… the best of both. That's something I know I can't have."

"I can think of things that you've done that's been of any good lately to 'justify' your return," Aerith remarks timidly, stroking the glass of the bottle. She tilts her head to the side a little and smiles, "You've saved me, more than once, for one. I could've died. Surely you ensuring my life is reason enough for you to come back, Axel. And you've been such a wonderful friend to the both of us. We would still be drowning in Nobodies and fearing Xehanort if it wasn't for you!"

I stiffen at a familiar voice and at a golden glow coming from the other human in the room, "Hey now, come on. I'm not guiding myself either, but I'm still living. I don't want to see you die, Axel. I was lucky… but you're luckier. So, I don't know, just come on and live for yourself, for those experiences you never got the chance to feel again after you stopped being a Somebody."

I swallow, "Roxas…"

His ghostly form is almost entirely solid, but over Sora, like a sheet of paper. Behind Roxas, Sora is seen looking at what's in front of him, confused. It's kinda funny to watch Sora's eyes move around rapidly, and Roxas' just stay solidly on me, even though they have exactly the same colour eyes. He smiles a little, "I never left. I'm just rare now, but I'm still here. You know deep down that you're hesitant, but you know what else? I know that deep down, _you want _that chance to live. You just don't know if you deserve it. And I'm telling you now, you do. So take it."

He's gone after that, and its Sora again, who is patting his body all over the place, wondering how and where Roxas came from. Aerith presses on again, "Roxas is right, Axel. Just take it. Who knows what tomorrow will bring? Take it and make the most of your new and better life, with us."

After several moments, pass, I nod the slightest bit, smiling wholly, "Al –"

"Allow me to make that decision _for _you!"

I'm grabbed by the ankles, and the three of us scream in surprise. I'm pulled from behind, and my body falls forward, my stomach slamming into the edge of the ground. My hands are clawing at the ground, desperate to stay up, but thousands of hands are grabbing me and pulling me down into the river. Both Sora and Aerith run towards me, both their hands try to grab one of mine each, but all four hands go through mine, because they can't touch me.

They tug harder, and I grip tighter, slowly sliding off the edge. The water's up to my chest now, and it feels so sticky and murky. I'm just staring at Aerith, who's refusing to give up, refusing to take no for an answer. She's crying, there's tears slowly sliding down her cheeks, and it breaks me inside to see that. Her hoarse cries of 'no no no no don't take him!' make it worse.

The water's at my chin. I smile a little at them, "I'm sorry."

Hades erupts from the water and pushes me down with him, "If I go down, I'm taking you with me!"

The other ghosts echo that statement in agreement, and her screams are now lost to me. I can see her face, it's tinged with green and wavy. There's a sudden ripple at the top, distorting her image further – it's probably one of the tears that's fallen. I'm still staring up at her as the ghosts pull me down, further and further into the river. The current is too strong for me to fight back, and I hope, just hope, that once I'm at the bottom of this thing, I'll be at peace and eternally floating… even if it wasn't my main choice. The lights at the top also begin to fade away.

As I'm dragged further down, the voices begin to fade, joining in a chain, like a soothing melody in the background, like they've accepted what's going to happen to them. It's… strangely peaceful. They're not holding me down anymore, either, because they know that I don't have the strength to pull myself back up to the surface and escape this underwater grave. A bubble flies up, air's escaping from my mouth, and as it does, I merely stare into the space straight ahead of me, watching the green turn from a lighter shade into a darker one. The souls are like white wisps going through the area, with occasional colour. There's some black ones, too, and when I briefly look to myself, I realise that I've become one of those black ones, with an occasional tinge of red. One of the black ones… I guess that means I did hold darkness in my heart after all.

Maybe… Maybe this won't be so bad.

The melody's suddenly broken.

It's distorted, they're screaming again and they've interrupted my almost-asleep state. I'm panicking and looking around, wondering why the noise is now so painful and screeching, and we all look up, though we're still gradually being dragged to the bottom, and we see a foreign figure swimming down. I can't see the person very well, but I know there's a lot of black there, and there's a lot of ghosts trying to drag the person down – but the person's swimming down willingly.

The movement of the clothes… the way it billows in the water…

My eyes are heavy, but I try and swim up and towards the invader, reaching a hand out, just as a gloved one is being reached out to me. Several ghosts grab me again and try to pull me down, and while I feel their tug, I feel this other one more, the one pulling me up and back towards the surface.

I can distinguish the voices of the fallen, _You cannot have him! He is ours! He is all ours!_

I don't hear anything more after that, because the rush of the water around me as I'm pulled up proves to be far too strong. All I can hear are the bubbles around me as they pass me, and light's just streaming back from the top. The water's going from dark green to light green, the sound is going from singing to screaming, and I've suddenly reached the surface, gasping for air I didn't know I'd need, and feeling strength in my muscles again as I swim to the side, still being grabbed from below.

The person and I bound out of the water and crawl to the far opposite side, as far away from the River Styx as possible. I'm leaning against the wall, breathing heavily and just absolutely petrified of what I was just in, and how both nice and horrid it was to be there. The water's slowly dripping off of me, and up ahead, Aerith, whose collected a bottle's worth of water from the river, and Sora, who is in absolute awe, run towards me and my saviour.

I turn my head to the left where the other person sits, and still breathing heavily, I smile a little, "Demyx…"

"If you told me you were coming back, I would've been here sooner!" he responds, also smiling, breathing heavily and wiping hair away from his eyes, "You should count yourself lucky that water's my element and that, while that pool did effect me, it didn't take me as fast as it tried to take you! Welcome back."

Sora looks to Demyx, "Thank you. Thank you so much."

Demyx says nothing and merely shrugs, silently insisting that it's nothing. He then stands to his feet and wipes off as much water as possible, before offering his hand to me to help me stand. I take it shakily, and stand, still not quite steady on my own feet. Aerith moves to help me stand, but then remembers that she cannot touch me. Exhaling, she looks down at the water and then at all of us, "Let's go back to Yen Sid's. We have what we need now," She looks to me, smiling, "You're coming back."

* * *

Demyx actually came with us this time. He was in awe at the 'coolness' of the Gummi Ship, wandering around, wanting to touch this and that. He, of course, didn't though – he has more sense than that, thankfully. He'd occasionally run up behind Sora and look at the monitor, before skittering back over to me to make sure that I'm okay.

We land with that heavy thud that I'm accustomed to, and then we jump down the stairs and out of the ship, now on solid ground. I spin in a small circle, looking around the area, observing the shining stars and how, in my eyes, they seem brighter than before. Although I'm still weak from the River Styx incident, I'm all the more excited and so happy that this is finally going to happen. We did it. I'm coming back. I'm going to live again, and this time, I'm going to live _right._

Sora's looking at me with a big, wide smile, "Hey, Axel?"

"Yeah?"

"Congratulations."

I grin, "Thanks, kid."

He then turns to Demyx, and, surprised, he remarks, "Hey, wait! I can see you here!"

Also surprised, Number IX quirks his eyebrow, "Really?" After a nod, he ponders for a moment and holds up his open hand, "Okay then Sora, how many fingers am I holding up?"

"Five."

"Wrong! I'm holding up four fingers, and one thumb," he grins.

I look at him blankly, "You're an idiot, Demyx."

He grins and stands along side me. We begin to follow Sora and Aerith's ascent to Yen Sid's room, and once we're there, the doors are thrown open, and they bound inside. Sora's voice is edgy and excited, and he's speaking as Aerith gently places the bottle on Yen Sid's desk, "So, we're back! We got the water from the River Styx. It was kinda hard, but, we've done it! Can you bring back Axel now?"

Yen Sid's surveying my current, weak and tired state. He also looks to Demyx, quirking an eyebrow and thoughtfully stroking his long, grey beard, "And what number are you? I don't quite recall you."

"Number IX!"

"And where did you die?"

"Sora killed me in the Underworld," he answers casually, shrugging his shoulders, "On their first visit to this world this time around, Axel was pushed off the bridge by Hades, but he got himself back up, and so I pushed Hades in to protect him. In their second visit, he was pulled into the River Styx after saying that he wanted to live, so I jumped in and got him out. And then I just jumped along for the ride as moral support for Number VIII here," he pokes me in the side, "That's all. Don't mind me, just being a spectator."

Yen Sid bows his head a little and shrugs. He grabs the bottle and leans back in his chair, observing it, "This will take about thirty minutes before it is safe to drink, Number VIII," he looks up at me, "so you will have to wait for a while. In thirty minutes, you will be like me – flesh and bone."

He whips out his wand and places the bottle on the table, leaning forward once again. After a few moments of focusing, he begins to wave his wand around, muttering numerous incantations. The water inside the glass begins to bubble, like acid, and if I squint, I can _very _slowly see the colour change from light green into light blue. Yen Sid then places his wand beside the bottle and leans back in his chair again, picks up his book, and begins to read, ignoring us.

We all waste the thirty minutes differently. Sora decides to nap on the floor. Demyx decides to run up and down the stairs as quietly as possible. Aerith and I decide to go for a walk around the front of the tower. The silence… it's hard to describe. It's both awkward and comfortable. It's awkward because, well, we've become so close and I don't really know what to say to her. It's comfortable because despite this closeness, inside, it feels like we've been this close for ages.

We take to eventually sitting on the pathway and watching the stars above. She soon begins to talk to me about her home world and how she remembers it as a child. It's strange that it matches up to what my world was, but I'm not going to complain. We probably did come from the same place, seeing as Radiant Garden was so huge. As time goes on, I find enough strength and… confidence? I think that's the emotion? I don't know. But I find enough of that to 'rest' my head on her shoulder. At least, I hope this shows her that I care.

"You're amazing," I breathe with closed eyes.

I can feel her smile, "Are you trying to tell me something?"

"Perhaps."

"Yooooooo! It's ready!"

I jump from my sitting position, half with shock and embarrassment, but otherwise with enthusiasm. Demyx is sticking his head out of the tower door, and then he fades past it. I walk through, hearing Aerith's footsteps behind me, and Demyx is grinning at me as we run up the stairs together. He finally says, "I see what you did there."

"Shut the fuck up, Demyx."

When the three of us are at the top, Sora's jumping up and down, super excited, and Yen Sid's an unemotional wall as always. Demyx is in a similar state to Sora, demanding that I hurry up and drink it already so we can celebrate. Aerith is just smiling at me, and I smile back for a moment before stepping forward, awaiting instructions from Yen Sid.

He picks up the bottle – the contents are now wholly light blue instead of wholly light green - and holds it towards me. I go to grab it, but he snatches it away immediately, hissing, "You still cannot hold things, remember? I must pour about a mouthful of this down your throat. It won't just hit the floor, it will travel through your system and bring you back to life. Are you ready to come back? Are you sure that this is what you want?"

I pause, a finger on my chin, and I turn to look at Aerith again.

She's my reason to come back, now.

I look back to Yen Sid and nod, "I'm sure, and I'm ready."

He leans forward slightly, holding the bottle over my head, and slowly tips it down and into my open, awaiting mouth. I can soon taste it – it tastes foul, really – and I drink it all down, until it stops pouring into my mouth. My eyes were shut tight, but when I open them again, I can see more glowing light, but it's blue instead of red this time. It's blinding, but I keep my eyes open the entire time, and solely on Aerith, because if it wasn't for her, this wouldn't be happening.

I want her to see what she's done for me. I want her to see the fruit of her labour.

When the light fades, I don't move and I don't look at my body. I'm still staring at her. Behind me, I hear Yen Sid say, "Number VIII, the Flurry of Dancing Flames, Axel… Welcome back to the world of the living."

On the far side, I hear Sora and Demyx shout with joy and pump their fists in the air. In front of me, Aerith bows her head for a moment before lifting it up, a wide smile on her face. I'm unable to do anything else for a few moments aside from speak. Two words leave my mouth. They're not firm, but they're not wholly shaking either, "I'm back."

Aerith takes a few steps towards me and nods a little, "Yes, yes you are."

I say nothing more, but I do dash forward towards her and envelope her in a hug, even picking her up off the ground. It feels so good to feel the warmth of her skin, it feels so good to feel her hold me back, it feels so good just to _touch. _The first thing I did, like I promised, was hold, and I'm holding _her. _Just… feeling all of this, just being able to _do _all of this, stirs numerous emotions inside of me –

_Emotions inside _of me.

Something's beating inside me. It feels entirely foreign until I realise that it's my heart.

…It's _my heart._

Everything, normal again, I…

I don't realise that I'm shaking until I put Aerith down and turn to look at Yen Sid, who has a slight smirk on his face. Aerith links her hand with mine – that's what makes me realise I'm shaking, because her soft hand is so incredibly still compared to mine – and I say, wetting my dry lips, "Thank you… I… I don't really know what else to say to you aside from thank you."

He bows his head a little and says nothing, before turning his gaze to the other ghost in the room. He tips the bottle towards Demyx, and tilts his head back a little, watching the face of the other man shift from joyous to amazed and stunned, "There's enough left for one more."


	11. Epilogue

Author's Note: And at last, the epilogue (however short, sorry DDDD:…). It's supposed to be like a diary entry. :3 Thanks for sticking with me through this, guys. It's much appreciated.

* * *

_**EPILOGUE**_

_It's been a year._

_It's been a whole year since that whacky adventure ended. Since… I became alive again, and with my heart this time. No longer a ghost, no longer a Nobody, but finally a Somebody again. Words can't really describe how I felt on that day, and twelve months later, I still don't now how to describe what I felt. 'Amazing', I guess, would be one, but that's not really a strong enough word._

_Pssh. Look at me, rambling. Nice one, Axel._

_So since then, me and Demyx decided to settle down in Radiant Garden. He was confused as to why I blurted, when we got back to that world, 'you gotta help me make a cake', but when he realised that it was for Merlin, who sent us to Yen Sid in the first place and got us to be living again, he wasted no time in helping me out. Sora and Aerith just shook their heads and laughed at us as we went around buying these supplies and making the best cake we could make. Sora would since tease us that we chose to make a cake on the day that we became alive again, but he can tease all he likes. It wasn't the greatest cake in the world, but Merlin liked it, so I was glad._

_Speaking of Sora, he, Riku and Kairi went back to Destiny Islands and visited every so often to check up on us and make sure we weren't up to no good; but, as Leon would always say, 'if they were up to no good, then I could dispatch of them easily with the others'. Leon's okay, but his sardonic, stoic personality grinds on my nerves sometimes. Still, he has a good heart, and that's what counts. But anyway, it turns out that Sora and Kairi finally got together, and that Riku was apparently 'checking out' this girl named Selphie on their islands. Good luck to him, because I'd hate to be the third wheel like that._

_Mickey, Donald and Goofy went back to their big ass castle, and they'd send us letters every now and then. As Yen Sid said to me when we first went on this journey, he'd make us do some community service to pay off the damage we'd done as Nobodies – Mickey would send these chores to us, and we'd do them. The first one I remember doing was rebuilding a village in the Land of the Dragons. Demyx complained so much about the cold then, and I admit I wasn't a huge fan of it either, but I could cope better. He made us do other little chores too, like clean his castle, but after a while, he was convinced that we'd done enough and left us alone, just sending us letters every now and then to check up on us._

_Everyone else went back to their daily routines, really. There's those three little fairies who try to steal money and treasures every so often, but they're too cute not to get permanently angry at, so, I let it slide. And they eventually give it back anyway… Leon and his friends went back to their jobs as the 'Hollow Bastion Restoration Committee'. They're nearly done now, they just need to fix up a bit of damage done by the Heartless in the bailey, and then it's complete. They're so excited. I help out where I can, that is when I'm not looking after the shop._

…_No don't look at me like that. A shop. Yes, a shop; it's not that hard to believe, is it? Well… Me and Demyx decided to open a magic shop of sorts. Just like, you know, to sell a few spells, help out in how to actually cast them (unlike SOME other magic stores…) and so on. It's kinda like a shop and a school put together. It's not much of a job, but hey, it's helping us get by… and it's my job. I like doing it, I have fun doing it, and so does Demyx. We've actually gotten a fair few customers, even out of our circle of friends. Yuffie's trying to learn to use magic like we do, instead of relying on her shiny orbs._

_Ohhh, hahaha. Speeeaking of Yuffie… She and Demyx got together. It's pretty cool really, they really suit each other in personality and even in fashion sense. Demyx insists on wearing blue and black, and he's always got three quarter pants on and a sunny smile. He's even got like this ninja star around his neck all the time now, a gift from his girlfriend. It looks identical to Roxas' pendant, but, I know for a fact that that symbol's pretty universal. He even considered redoing his hair at one point and getting rid of that god-awful mullet and faux hawk combo, but she likes it, so he kept it. I've never really seen them fight, which is great._

_Finally… There's Aerith and I. _

_Where do I start? Well, I guess, once the shop was up and running, I took her out to dinner. We've been together ever since. As time passed, she learnt a lot more about me, and I learnt a lot more about her – like, she used to wait around Cloud because she had feelings for him, but she got sick of it just before I came back, I guess. Sometimes I wonder if I'm a rebound of sorts, but when I look into her eyes, I know that's not the case. She's my life now, I help her with her flower business pretty much everyday, and just… I'm really glad I decided to muster up the courage and ask her to be my compass through my darkest days._

_I feel so much more normal now. I never thought I'd miss my heart this much, or being alive at all. I feel like the normal Axel, the normal Lea, even. There's a Frisbee that hangs on the wall next to the counter of the shop, and I look at it everyday and smile, remembering those good times and how I've been given a second chance. Demyx registers a similar sediment with the giant sitar that sits in the back room._

_And about this…? Well… Ever since that day, I've written down everything that's happened in my day, from the first breath to the games I had with Sora and Riku and Demyx with my Frisbee. Big things or little things, I've written them all down, exactly like this, because, for this second chance at life… I don't want to forget or miss a thing. Life's precious, and we should appreciate it more. And sometimes we might not always have direction, but we'll find it eventually, and then we're back on track for the rest of our lives._

_Although I'm still adjusting to this, even a year later, I know everything will turn out fine. Just fine. I have direction now, I know where I'm going and what I'm doing this time. The compass' needle has stopped spinning aimlessly, and it points forward, to the rest of my life – the rest of my new and better life. And you know what? I'm going to live it to my fullest – got it memorized?

* * *

_

Author's Note: Aaaand, that's it! I've finally finished my first KH multichap XD There's plans for (many) more in the future, by the way, so don't think that I've vanished just yet :P My next major project will be a multichap Axel/Roxas (because yes, I too ship this, but not on the scary, obsessive level that some people do – I mean, I did pair up Axel with _Aerith _(A GIRL OMG LOL). The title will be **"End Of Silence"**. And I look forward to writing it and posting it :3

Now, to those of you who have followed me from Tekken, you know what comes next! Yup yup, it's the giant thank you notes!

_TeaC0sy:_

Welcome… to the not-Tekken side XDXDXD. Seriously though. Thanks a bunch, you. You're now the only person ever to have been in my giant thank you notes at the end of evvvvery single multichap fic of mine, lmaooo. But yeah. I remember discussing this with you in the early days, and you pressured me SO MUCH to do it, and look what happened :P Loooooooool. But but but yeah. You don't even know KH that well and you still read this :3 Thank youuuu.

_AmberAnodyne:_

Oh shi – HEY THERE, YOU. AXEL BABY. Again, thanks for sticking by me with this. Your reactions to every chapter have been thoroughly enjoyable :3 I'm glad you enjoyed the story and that you flailed and rolled around after every chapter XDXDXD I'm glad you liked this idea, too. Because honestly, I was as worried as fuck when writing/initially posting it, but you made me go "fuck it" XD

_Danko Kaji:_

Hey! Sup? Welcome to the giant thank you notes :P I cannot express how much I adore your writing. Any time I think of KH (or FF), I think of your awesome writing. I hope that this story has been enjoyable for you too, and I hope that you're doing well in your life right now also. This whole fic has been a hell of a ride, but listening to you talk my ear off about it (however seldom due to my gay Uni constraints) has made it worth it XD And yeah :3

And for the rest of my loving fans, thanks a billion: Marron Everard, story+time, Princess of the Knight, RoseWoodDancer95, SeungSeiRan (-tackleglomphug- Miss you D:!), Casamora, Lady Goddess Sephiroth (thank you very much for your kind words :3), , Shadow Blackheart, becoafamu (I MISS YOU AND PLEASE UPDATE AND HI AND SUP AND UPDATE DAMMIT), nerdishh (best? No. But, thank you XD), surxi25, ChaoticChild, AsakuraX, SkyWren48 (thank you so, so much. Your review still brings an enormous smile to my face :)!), !), Shadow Oblivion, sickweirdo, and last but not least, TheForgottenHero.

But yeah, thanks for the ride, you guys! It's been amazing. Stay safe, and, until next time! :)


End file.
